A New Beginning (a Divergent high school story)
by nebulahurley
Summary: Tris Prior is given a new life: a new school, a new chance, a new story. The question is, will she take it?
1. A New Beginning

**A/N Hello! This is my second fanfiction so far, and it's going to be based on the Divergent series.**  
**This will involve Divergent characters being thrown into the modern world, which I'm going to do by placing them in high school. For some inexplicable reason, I enjoy these fanfictions and I've decided to have a go at writing one of my own.  
Disclaimer: All rights to the heartbreaker and destroyer of my OTP, Veronica Roth.  
I'm going to to end this not-short-but-not-long author's note by starting the story now.**

**Enjoy!**

_Tris POV_

The bell goes off with an deafening clang. On cue, hundreds of students pour in through the doors and begin the school day. I push my way through the crowd and find my way to the main office.

There, a man sits, typing furiously on his computer. I clear my throat awkwardly.  
"Oh! I'm so sorry. I assume you're Beatrice Prior?"  
I shift. This is my chance at a new beginning, a chance to leave all that I've been through behind me.  
In a split second, I hit upon it.  
I blink.  
"Call me Tris. I prefer to be known by that name."  
"Alright, Tris. Here's your timetable."  
He reaches across his desk and takes a piece of paper from the printer beside it, handing it to me.  
"First period is Science, in room 2. If you hurry, you'll get there in time. Here's a map."

I thank him and set off, trying to understand the map that he gave me, to no avail. As I walk through the corridors, I bump into a girl who is flying past me.  
"Oh, my god! I'm so sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going! Are you OK?"  
I wince. When I look up, I meet the worried gaze of a girl with coffee coloured skin and dark hair. She's pretty in every sense of the word, the polar opposite of me.  
"My name's Christina. What's yours?"  
I mumble a reply, still slightly dazed.  
"Tris! What do you have next? I have science, with Ms. Matthews in Room 2," Christina says, snapping her fingers in front of my face.  
I feel relieved. At least there's someone who knows where I'm going.  
"I have Science in Room 2 as well," I say, finally speaking properly. I give her a smile: I'm determined to make a fresh start and put everything behind me. When we moved, I was afraid that I wouldn't make any friends and stay the way I was before, closed up and awkward. Perhaps it won't be so hard anymore.

Christina pulls me along to Room 2. We enter, and everybody turns around and stares at us. I feel self-conscious; I realise that I probably shouldn't have grabbed random clothes and thrown them on. I look down. I'm wearing a hoodie and leggings, acceptable but dull and drab compared to some of the things the other girls are wearing.

"Sit down!" the teacher snaps. "You're late." Christina flashes a stunning smile and replies, "Sorry, Ms. Matthews." She doesn't seem to care, whilst I look down, sure that my face is a flaming red. I can practically feel the heat flushing across my cheeks.

"Alright. We're going to be doing an assignment on acids and alkalis. Write an essay on the properties of these, with your partners."  
_Partners?_  
I freeze. I'm supposed to write an essay with somebody I barely know. That's going to turn out well.

"I will be assigning the partners," Ms. Matthews continues, shooting an icy glare at the students who groan and complain.  
"Christina and Will," she begins. A wide smile spreads across Christina's face and she glances at a boy slouched in his chair across the room. He also sits up when he hears this. Christina looks down and blushes. I smile. Christina seems like she'll be a good friend, and she's also clearly into Will. I'm going to have to do something about that.

"Uriah and Marlene," Ms. Matthews says. A tan boy a few seats away from me smiles lazily at a girl in sitting in front. I don't see her face. but by her posture, she seems glad.  
She continues on, pairing everybody up. One by one, everyone finds out their partners. My name hasn't been called out yet.  
"And finally, Tris and Four."

_Who the hell is Four?  
_There's a nudge on my shoulder. I look behind me to see a boy with ruffled brown hair and deep blue ocean eyes. I could drown in those eyes.  
"I'm Four," he whispers.  
"Tris."  
"Yeah, I know."  
I smile at him, then realise I've been staring and turn around, my cheeks turning red, again.  
"Class dismissed!"  
Has it really been one hour?  
I sling my bag over my shoulder and leave.  
"Hey, Tris! Tris!" Christina yells. "You were going to leave without me?" she gasps, feinting horror. I smile.  
Maybe this year won't be so bad after all.

**A/N How was that? I won't be updating every day, probably once a week or so. There will be FourTris, don't worry- I just feel like they need to get to know each other first before beginning a relationship. I don't know how long this story is going to be, I think I will just be writing as it goes until I feel the story is over.**  
**I would be grateful if you reviewed, either on my first or this story.**  
**Thank you!**

_~Joanna_


	2. Meeting Her

**A/N I'm back! This time, I'm going to be including Four's POV... interesting.**

**All rights to the professional heartbreaker, otherwise known as Veronica Roth.**

**(this chapter is rated T for language)**

_Four/Tobias POV _**(like omf holy shite)**

Another day, another school year. I groan and tumble out of bed, throwing on a t-shirt and jeans. I grab breakfast on my way out the door. Thank the Lord Marcus is still asleep. He was drunk last night; he won't be up until at least one in the afternoon. It means I can escape unscathed.

I begin driving to school. I hope that the girls aren't all over me this time, like last year. All of them are absolute sluts. They cake make-up onto their faces and their clothes are always way too tight and revealing. I park and open the door. Immediately, a swarm of girls surround me.

"Four! Go out with me?"  
"Four! Here's my number! Call me sometime!"  
"Do you like my shirt, Four? I got it specially for you!"

I push, no, I am degraded to _shoving_ through the crowd of too-eager girls and make my way to the school entrance. I collect my timetable from Max, who works in reception. I glance at my watch. I've got five minutes until my first period, Science, with Ms. Matthews. Perfect.  
I arrive just in time as the teacher walks in. I wrinkle my nose. I've never liked Ms. Matthews. She's too cold and rude, and she acts like she's above everyone else, even her colleagues.  
I sit next to Zeke, who's been my best friend since we were tiny. Uriah, his brother, is beside him.  
"Hey, Four! How's it going, my man?" Zeke asks. We slap hands.  
"It's been good. It sucks though, coming back to school."  
"Yeah, I know," Zeke complains.

The lesson begins. I notice that two seats are still empty. Just as I do, the door swings open and Christina comes in with a new girl I've never seen before. They sit down, and it's clear the new girl is blushing, even though she's dipped her head so her long blonde hair covers her face. I compare her to the other girls. She's not wearing slutty clothes- in fact, she's got a hoodie and leggings on, plain and normal compared to everybody else. I can already sense that the other girls are looking at her with distaste because she doesn't dress like the rest of them.

I don't listen to Ms. Matthews. I zone out after she mentions writing an essay.  
"Christina and Will," I jerk up. We going to have partners. _Shit_. Last time, I got paired with Lauren, the queen of the sluts. She was all over me, and got hardly anything done. I did most of the work, and it was also very hard to refrain from punching her in the face whenever she sashayed up to me. I can already feel the rabid stares, like dogs, coming from the girls in the room. I can only hope I get paired up with Zeke, or Uriah.

"Tris..." I look up. Is that the new girl's name?  
"And Four." Immediately, I notice all the girls, especially Lauren, staring at Tris, if that's what she's called, with jealousy and anger.  
I tap her shoulder. She's sitting in front of me.  
She turns around, and I find myself staring into stormy blue-grey eyes. Stormy blue-grey eyes that tell a _story_.  
I'm speechless for a moment, but I find the words and say, "I'm Four."

She smiles at me. _God, that smile._

"Tris."  
"Yeah, I know."  
The lesson ends. Tris slings her backpack over her shoulder and leaves. I was hoping to talk to Tris about our assignment, but I'll catch her at lunch or something. Christina runs after her.  
"Tris! Tris!" Her voice fades as she gets further away. I leave the room with Zeke.

**A/N I know, I know... this story is so cliché. This chapter is also quite short... oh well.**  
**I've made Zeke and Uriah and Tris and Four all the same age, because it's going to get complicated if they're all in different years and I'm British, so I don't understand fully how American high school works.**  
**I could have put them into secondary school, which is what I call it, but frankly it doesn't have the same tone to it.**  
**OK, that probably didn't make sense to you.**  
**End of the rant.**  
**I would be grateful if you reviewed!**

**:3**

_~Joanna_


	3. The Fight

**A/N Wow... third time updating this week...**  
**I think it's because I know where I want the story to go for the next few chapters.**  
**Anywaaay, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: No. I'm not Veronica Roth. I cry.**

_Tris POV_

I look at the clock. It's lunchtime. The teacher calls out, "Class dismissed!" I get up and make my way to the canteen. I'm prepared to eat lunch alone. At the back of the hall. That's what it was like at my old school, anyway. I was forgettable. Uninteresting. Nobody felt like it was worth their while sitting with me.

As I pay for my food, I hear my name being called. Christina comes up to me, exclaiming, "Tris! There you are! I was wondering if you maybe wanted to eat lunch with us?" I blink, taken aback. But this is a new school, and a new life. I find myself saying "Sure!"  
Christina grabs my hand and pulls me to a table in the centre of the canteen. I feel self-conscious, because there are so many people around me. I'm used to being on the edge, on the outside looking in. I guess I should have known Christina's not the type to be on the side.  
I'm pulled out of my thoughts by Christina nudging me. "Let me introduce you to everyone." I nod.  
"That's Uriah," she begins, pointing at the boy I saw in Science earlier today, the one who got paired with...  
"Marlene," Christina continues. They smile at me; and when I look closer, I see that they sit closer than friends would, but further apart than if they were in a relationship.  
"Zeke," Christina says. Uriah interrupts, saying, "Unfortunately, Zeke is my idiot brother."  
"Hey!" Zeke complains. The table bursts into laughter, and I start laughing too. I might just have found the place I belong.  
"That's Lynn," she says, nodding towards a girl with a shaved head and piercings. Lynn looks up and scowls at me.  
"She's like that with everyone," Marlene whispers.  
"And that's Four."  
I turn my head to see the same boy that sat behind me in class. The one with the deep ocean-blue eyes I could drown in. The ridiculously good looking one that would never, ever be interested in me.  
_Stop it, Tris._

I've been staring - _again_, but then, he has been staring back, his eyes swallowing me whole. I blush and look down, sure that I could compete with a tomato. Beside me, Christina stifles a giggle. "Ooh," she whispers, shoving me playfully. "Does Trissy-poo have a crush?"

I look up. "No!" I deny. "Of course not! What makes you think that?"  
"Hun, your face is redder than a tomato."  
I ignore her and ask, "What the _hell_ of a name is Trissy-poo?"  
She just laughs. "I figured that would annoy you. It's nearly time for our next lesson, anyway. What do you have?"  
I glance down at my timetable, running a finger down it.  
"Gym, with somebody called... Coach... Amar?" I question. Christina squeals and claps.  
"I have that too! Let's go!"  
I begin to be dragged away by Christina, but Four stops me.  
"Tris." He begins, his eyes holding mine. "I was thinking... we could get started on our essay today. At your house." He flashes me a flawless grin, and I'm sure that everyone can hear my heart rate speed up. "OK. Let me just write my address down for you."  
I grab a pen from my bag and take his hand. Immediately, a jolt of electricity shoots up my arm, and judging by the way his eyes widen and his face changes, Four felt it too. I finish writing and smile at him. "I have to go. I'll be late for Gym."  
"Wait, you mean Gym, with Coach Amar?"  
"Yeah."  
"Oh, cool. I have that too. We'll walk there together!"  
As we leave, I see a girl grab Four's arm. I tense up, but stop myself. Who am I to stake claim? I've known the boy for all of a few hours.  
"Hey, Four." she says.  
"Lauren," Four replies, his teeth gritted.  
"You never called me," she continues, flashing him a flirty smile. My blood boils.  
"I'm. Not. Interested. When will you understand?" Four replies. We leave, leaving Lauren staring at us with anger and jealousy crossing her face.

**oh no the page broke *gasp***

"Right then, munchkins," Coach Amar grins. "Let's see. Today we're going to be doing fights. I'll begin with showing you some movements and then I'll pair you up and you will fight. Understood?"  
We nod. "Four."  
"Yes, sir."  
"You'll be my demonstrator today."  
"Yes, sir."  
Four begins to demonstrate on the punching bag that hangs from the ceiling. All the girls begin giggling, staring at his muscles. I roll my eyes and look away. They don't know that I've been learning martial arts and kickboxing since I was seven, and that I have a black belt in my list of achievements. It's my only redeeming feature. Four looks at me, breaking his concentration for a moment. His eyes catch mine, thoughtful. I hitch a breath, my heart rate speeds up, yet again. What is he doing to me?

Soon, Coach Amar pairs us up. I realise I've been paired with Lauren. She's smirking and whispering to the two girls beside her, staring at me with venom. I suppress a snort. She thinks I'll be an easy target, due to my petite frame and small stature.

Well then, I'll just have to prove her wrong.

We're up first. I step onto the mat, staring back at Lauren. Her gaze falters, and for a moment I see the nervousness underneath. I should be sympathetic. I should be.

Tough luck, because I'm not.

We shake hands. "I saw you sit today with Four. Stay away from him. He's mine." she spits.  
"Oh yeah? Says who?"  
Even I'm taken aback by my comment. I would never have said that at my old school. I guess I've changed a lot, even though I've only been here one day.

"Fight!"

I know she'll make the first move. She stumbles toward me with all the grace of a big brown bear. I duck her flimsy punch and jab at her torso. She falls back, and as she does so, I land an explosive punch on her jaw. She clutches it, groaning, as she rolls on the floor.  
"What's wrong?" I hiss. "Isn't your dear Four watching?"  
This seems to inspire her. She pulls herself up and swings at me again. I launch a roundhouse kick, meaning she falls down, again. My God, how weak is this girl? It's only been a minute and I've crushed her. Twice.

I raise my eyebrows at Coach Amar. Everyone around him looks shocked, especially Four. I proved everybody wrong. They'll never doubt me again.  
_You're letting me continue this against her?_ I ask the coach.  
_Well, no. I'm not making that mistake._ He silently replies.

"Fight over!" declares Coach Amar. Lauren doesn't hear. Just as I'm about to step off the mat, she comes at me again. I can hear her heavy breathing. I don't pause. I launch an explosive back kick and knock her down. "Hun," I whisper in her ear, "he ain't interested."

One of Lauren's minions looks at me with distaste. "That was just luck."  
I snort. "I knocked her down with a few kicks and punches. She's lucky I didn't aim in the places that would have knocked her unconscious. It's not luck. Lauren's just crap."  
Coach Amar kneels by Lauren. "She's fine. Just a few bruises, but no real damage."  
I walk over and pull her up. It's not because I'm feeling kind.  
"I always have the last laugh," I whisper in her ear.  
"_Always._"

**A/N Ooohhhh... Tris is getting sassy! I've always wanted to see Tris with attitude... **

**Also, making up for the short chapter before with this long one ^^**

**I get a warm feeling when I see a review, fave, follow, anything. I would be SO SO SO SO grateful if you guys did any of those :)  
Thank you!**

_~Joanna_


	4. I'm Gone

**A/N Yay! New chapter!**  
**I have no school tomorrow *gasp*, which means more time for writing, and therefore more chapters and updates!**  
**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: all rights to the woman-I-love-for-creating-my-OTP-but-the-woman-I-hate-for-destroying-my-OTP, Veronica Roth.**

_Four POV_

I feel uncomfortable and attacked. All the girls are staring at me and giggling whilst I demonstrate, not really paying attention to the moves.

I glance at Tris. She rolls her eyes and looks away. Part of me is relieved that she's different, whilst another is disappointed that she's not interested. I catch her glance, and find myself staring at her stormy blue-grey eyes. She stares right back.  
"Four!" Coach Amar whispers, looking annoyed. "Continue!"  
I realise my movements have faltered. I shake my head - what is Tris doing to me? I can't like her. I've only known her for one day, but already she dominates my thoughts, even when she's not with me.  
Coach Amar begins pairing us up. I notice he's paired Tris with Lauren, almost as if he's looking to see what Tris can do - or wanting to see how much she can take before she breaks. I can't deny it, no matter how much I want to - I'm worried. Tris is petite and slim, whilst Lauren is taller and chunkier. I don't want to watch.  
They shake hands. Lauren whispers something in her ear. I catch the words "Stay away," and "Four." When will she realise? I would never get together with Lauren, ever. Tris shoots a scathing look at her and says in an audible whisper, "Oh yeah? Says who?"  
What is she talking about?  
Tris lifts her chin, determination crossing her small face.  
"Fight!"  
I can't help myself. I look at Lauren, then at Tris, then at Lauren again, who's now moving towards Tris. I bite my lip. Lauren swings a crazy punch. Tris ducks and jabs at Lauren's torso, making her fall back. Tris punches Lauren in the jaw. Hard. Lauren's now rolling around.  
I'm shocked. My jaw falls open. Tris looks over and smirks.  
She kneels by Lauren and whispers in her ear. This inspires her and Lauren gets up. I shake my head, disgusted. Why doesn't Lauren just concede? Tris knocked her down with two punches in five seconds. I hear a groan. I realise Tris launched a very powerful roundhouse kick, judging by her stance, and has knocked Lauren down. Again.  
Tris almost imperceptibly raises her eyebrows at the coach, sending a silent message. He shakes his head slightly, replying.  
Tris hops off the mat. Lauren comes up again, and I begin to open my mouth, about to warn Tris, but she doesn't even look back, launching an explosive back kick. I can't find any words. She's _amazing_. This just makes me like her even more.  
Wait, I like her?

_Tris POV_

I smirk at Four, whose jaw is open. I march over and shut it, then join Christina. "Molly looks furious," she whispers. "What did you say to her?"  
I laugh. "Is that her name? I said that her Queen Lauren was just a crap fighter and that's why I won."  
"You're amazing," she says reverently.  
"That tends to happen when you're a third-dan black belt and you've been training for most of your life."  
We turn to watch the next fight. It's Four against somebody named Eric. I don't like the look of Eric, with his greasy hair and piercings.  
The whistle blows.  
Four waits, standing on the mat. Eric runs towards Four and swings at him. Four ducks and slams a fist into Eric's jaw, but Eric doesn't fall, instead landing a kick on Four's stomach. I'm worried now. Eric's good, almost as good as Four. I bite my knuckles. Why am I worried? I can't like Four.  
Four falls down. Eric is immediately on top of him, punching him over and over again. I can't take this much longer.  
I march over to Coach Amar. "You're really going to let this continue?" I demand.  
"Why don't you go in there and break it up, then?" he smirks.  
"I think I will."  
He open his mouth as if to stop me, but it's too late. I walk behind Eric and sweep his legs off the floor with a kick. He moans and lands on the mat. When he realises that I stopped him, his eyes widen in anger and he starts towards me. I counter-attack his kick and punch him where the sun don't shine.  
"How... did... you...do...that?" wheezes Four, holding his bleeding nose.  
"I'm a third-dan black belt," I laugh, pulling him up. I look at Eric's body with disapproval. Only somebody really weak would exploit their opponent's fall in a 'friendly' fight.  
"Let's get you to the nurse."

**sorry for breaking the page, I'm just too clumsy...**

_Four POV_

Tris sits beside me, texting on her phone. I keep on looking back at her in amazement. She was so _strong, _when she was fighting Eric, so determined, fire in those eyes. The opposite of the meek and embarrassed girl I saw this morning. I can't stop myself from it - I like her. I like how she stands up against cruelty, I like how she's different to all the others and doesn't throw herself at me.  
She can't like me back - not a beautiful, special girl like her.  
"Why are you staring at me?" she asks, looking back with large doe eyes.  
I grin. "Nothing."  
"Tell me!" she whines, nudging my arm. "Have I got something on my face or what?"  
I can't tell her that it's because I'm mesmerised by her quiet beauty.  
_Quick, quick. Excuse! Think of an excuse!_

I stutter. "Erm..."  
She interrupts me. "I just got a text from Uriah. Apparently there's going to be a party at his house, and he invited both of us. Do you want to go?"  
I'm relieved that there's a distraction. _Thank you, Uriah_. "OK! It should be fun." She smiles at me. I have to catch my breath. Her smile is so breathtaking and genuine. I can't help it.  
I think I'm falling for her.

Scrap that.

I'm already gone.

**A/N You could cut through that sexual tension like cheese. There will be FourTris later, don't worry, it's just I want it to be a slow-burner. To be honest, I think it would their relationship would be so much better if they got to know each other first rather than if they saw each other and became romantically related within a few days. Patience, grasshopper...**

**I'm going to try and get the next update up tomorrow.**

**Thank you so much for all the faves and follows, a special mention to archerqueen, who helped me with understanding how American school works, and who also just happens to have brilliant writing skills.**

**Who's excited for the Insurgent film?**

**ME!**

_~Joanna_


	5. Dying Inside

**A/N No school today! *cheers* **  
**I actually have nothing to say.**  
**So without further ado, let's get on with the story!**

**_(this chapter is rated T for a reason)_**

**Disclaimer: If I was Veronica Roth, I would have created a different ending where ****_certain_**** people actually ****_live_**** and ****_certain_**** OTPs ****_remain intact_****.**

_Tris POV_

"Oh, come on!" Christina squeals. "He totally likes you!"  
I scoff. How can anybody like me? I'm plain, and drab, and nobody would ever cast a second glance at me. I know that I'm supposed to leave everything behind me, but I can't deny the truth. Four doesn't like me. He can't.  
"He doesn't, Christina," I mumble awkwardly. "Just leave me alone."  
"Self esteem, Tris! He has to like you. You saved his ass getting kicked!"  
I roll my eyes. Christina squeals again. "Ooh! There's going to be a party at Uriah's house in Saturday, and today's a Thursday. Three days to get you ready! We're going shopping tomorrow. No, today."  
I stop short. If there's one thing I hate most in the world, it's shopping. And with Christina, it's going to be ten times worse than usual. I'm not going to get out of this one, no matter how hard I try.  
"Not today. Four's coming over later to work on our assignment, so we'll go tomorrow," I say. It's the best I can get.  
"Ooh! Tomorrow's a Friday! We'll have more time! And did I hear you say Four's coming over to your house today?"  
"Yes." I reply shortly. "I have to go, otherwise I'll be late for Music."  
Christina finally lets me go. As I walk away, I feel a tap on my shoulder. It's Four. I look down, blushing. I have to admit it. I like him, though he can't possibly like me back. He's the kind of guy that would have loads of girls chasing after him, like Lauren. Pretty girls, girls who are so much better than me.  
"What have you got next?" he asks, peering over my shoulder at the timetable I hold in my hand. His eyes scan down it, and then he lets out a chuckle. "We have all the same classes but one. I've got Music too, let's go."  
I'm surprised but pleased and begin to follow him. "Ms. Wu is the music teacher," Four explains. "She's the best you're going to get." I nod and push open the doors to find students sitting in rows of chairs that are arranged in a semicircle and surround a piano and some other instruments. Lauren is in this class - but I'm not intimidated by her anymore, not when I was the one who gave her that bruised eye and split lip. The group of girls surrounding her look up and see Four beside me. Their eyes flare with anger. "Don't let them get to you," Four whispers in my ear. His whisper tickles my neck and I shiver, heat replacing the blood coursing through my veins. I sit down at the edge of a row, and as soon as I leave Four, a gaggle of girls stream over to him. I shake my head, trying not to laugh as he mouths, _help me.  
Why?  
_He looks shocked for a moment but relaxes as I mouth, _just joking_.  
I must be brave.  
I stand up on my chair and yell, "HEY!"  
Everyone turns to look at me.

"In case you hadn't realized, poor Four is being overwhelmed by you SLUTS! So move away and let him sit down and breathe!"  
I hop down and glance over at Four, who is smirking slightly. The girls all look at me angrily.  
"Who does she think she is?"  
"Four's mine! I'm not letting him go!"  
"She's just an attention grabbing _whore_."  
Where have I heard that before?  
"She's just an attention grabbing whore."  
_"She's just an attention grabbing whore."_

_NO! Don't remember. Don't remember.  
I don't remember, I don't remember, I can't let myself remember.  
But I do, I do, I do.  
I do remember._

* * *

**I'm running through the hallways, running, running, running.  
Where am I going?  
I don't know, I don't know.  
All I know is that I am running. Running from the venomous words that clamp around me and pull me back, strangling, oppressive. I'm gasping for air, helpless, helpless.  
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.**

**I lock myself in the toilet and pull out the blade I always keep in my pocket to remind me how useless I am.  
"She's just an attention grabbing whore."  
"Ugly, fat bitch."  
"Nobody wants you, why don't you just go?"  
"Can't you just die? I've been planning a party for when you do."**

**No, no, no.**

**I drag the blade down my arm and grit my teeth as the warm blood trickles down it. This is what I deserve for being an attention grabbing whore. This is what I earn for being an ugly, fat bitch. **

_**Why am I still here?**_

_**Why can't I just go?**_

* * *

"Tris. Tris! Look at me!"  
The voice is deep, rumbling. It's Four. I wince and bury my face in my hands. I once knew a voice that was the opposite of Four's. High pitched, filled with venom and malice.  
_Peter._

_NO! Don't remember. Don't remember.  
I don't remember, I don't remember, I can't let myself remember.  
But I do, I do, I do.  
I do remember._

* * *

**I am screaming, screaming until my voice is hoarse and I have no sound left in me. I'm being dragged... where, I don't know. Where, I don't want to know.  
But I need to know. I need to know.  
"What use is your black belt now?" taunts a high-pitched male voice. My hands and legs are tied up. I have no way of defending myself. I let out a muffled scream into my gag.  
"Slut," spits Drew as he cuts off my clothes.  
_No, no, no.  
_Peter laughs manically, pressing a knife to my stomach.  
I yelp in pain.  
"Oh, look at that. I wanted to take care of her arms too... but it seems like she's taken care of that. She realises what a piece of filth she is already."  
_No, no, no._  
I am drawing in a breath, I am crying, I am sobbing. I am slipping in, and out. Where? Where? Where does the line end? When can I go?**

**Life is only temporary. Maybe I will leave, and wake up in another world, where the lights and sounds and words aren't so harsh.  
_I don't know, I don't know, I don't know._**

* * *

"Tris!"  
I must look up. Four is kneeling in front of me anxiously. I look at him through blurred eyes. Everyone is staring at me.  
"Come on. Here." he hands me a tissue. I feel like laughing. What use is a tissue against my demons that gnaw inside me? I take it anyway. Four sits next to me.  
"Hey. Hey," he says, slipping an arm around my shoulders. I should tense up. I should. But I don't, because I don't need to. I don't feel the need to. I earn several jealous looks.  
He notices, but doesn't say anything.  
"Hey. It's OK. We can talk later, when I come over."  
I nod and press my face into his chest, heaving a sob.  
I cannot be like this. I told myself I would be strong. I told myself. I promised. I promised.  
I drag in a deep breath.  
I close my eyes one last time and sit up straight, wiping my eyes.  
I am used to this, acting like I'm fine.  
I turn to Four. "Do I look I've been crying?"  
"No, Tris. You look tough as nails."

**PAGEBREAKYPAGEBREAKYPAGEBREAKY**

"Alright, class!" says Ms. Wu. "It is well known that the tradition is for the new student to perform in class. And it seems that the new student is Tris!"  
What?  
How am I supposed to perform in front after everyone after what I just went through. I blink one more time, and get up. I must be brave. I self-learnt piano from when I was nine, because it was a way to pour my depression out. I know what I'm going to sing. I close my eyes for a moment.

**_How can I make sure no one notices me_**  
**_Don't want a conversation with nobody_**  
**_And it hurts too much to say how I feel_**  
**_What you don't know, is all I know_**

**_How can I make sure that I fool everyone_**  
**_Gonna wear a suit and tie_**  
**_And put my bravest face on_**  
**_And it's far too deep to show you this wound_**  
**_No it won't heal no time soon_**  
**_Nobody knows what I'm going through_**

**_I'm dying inside_**  
**_Who knows what I'm thinking_**  
**_What I'm trying to hide_**  
**_Yeah, I'm dying all night_**  
**_I'm breathing but I can't feel life_**  
**_I'm smiling but I'm dying inside_**

**_How can I make sure_**  
**_I'm invisible_**  
**_I find just a simple phrase that may say it all_**  
**_'Cause it's far too soon and not the right time_**  
**_What I've seen was for my eyes_**

**_And how can I make sure_**  
**_No one worries for me_**  
**_'Cause I don't need a helping hand_**  
**_And don't want sympathy_**  
**_Don't know what I need but know what I don't_**  
**_What you can't see it feels so broke_**  
**_That you can't see is how I'll cope_**

**_'Cause I'm dying inside_**  
**_Who knows what I'm thinking_**  
**_What I'm trying to hide_**  
**_Yeah, I'm dying all night_**  
**_I'm breathing but I can't feel life_**  
**_I'm smiling but I'm dying inside_**

**_Want everyone around to think that I'm alright_**  
**_Hope they assume I've left the dark and found the light_**  
**_Want them to think that I don't cry myself to sleep at night_**

**_Ooh, ooh_**

**_Yeah, I'm dying inside_**  
**_Who knows what I'm thinking_**  
**_What I'm trying to hide_**  
**_Yeah, I'm dying all night_**  
**_I'm breathing but I can't feel life_**  
**_I'm smiling but I'm dying inside_**

I play the last chord.  
I realise I'm crying.  
Why am I crying?

**A/N the song that Tris sung was 'Dying Inside' by Gary Barlow.**  
**So... you all know Tris' secret... there will be more revealed in the next chapter, which I have already started work on.**  
**The song was one of many I leaned on when I was going through my depression. It was one I related to enormously, and I just wanted to share it because it helped me through a lot.**  
**Till next time!**  
_~Joanna_


	6. Coming Home

**A/N So last chapter, we found out Tris' story, and what she wanted to leave behind... this chapter is going to include Four's POV *ooh* and, and, and (don't let your head explode) there might be some FourTris fluff! Enjoy!  
Disclaimer:  
me: *in a patient voice* Uriah, if you say that I don't own anything, I'll give you my Dauntless cake.  
Uriah: really?!  
me: yes. NOW SAY IT!  
Uriah: She doesn't own anything!  
me: sorry, Uriah. I ate all of my cake whilst you were saying it. *smirks*  
Uriah:  
Uriah:  
*wrestling match ensues***

_Four POV_

"HEY!" Tris yells. Is this what she's planning to do to help me?  
"In case you hadn't realised, poor Four is being overwhelmed by you SLUTS! So move away and let him sit down and breathe!"  
I can't help it - I smile. This is the girl I've fallen for.  
I can hear the insults being thrown at Tris.  
"She's just an attention grabbing whore."  
Tris hears. Her eyes widen, and all of sudden she's rocking on her heels in the chair, back and forth, back and forth. Everyone stops short and stares at her. She screams into her knees, crying, sobbing. I hurt for her. It's cheesy, but I do.  
I move over and kneel in front of her.  
"Tris. Tris! Look at me!" I say, desperately. She pauses for a moment, and I feel relieved, but the muffled screaming starts up again. I feel like crying myself. How can this happen to me? I used to be hard, submissive of everyone round me except my group of friends. But Tris has opened me up.  
I shake my head. Tris is still rocking back and forth. I'm going to try again.  
"Tris!" I say, searching for a reply. She looks up, her beautiful blue-grey eyes troubled. I swallow a lump that rises in my throat at seeing her in pain. I hand her a tissue.  
"Come on. Here." I delve into my pocket and hand her a tissue. She sees it and looks like she's amused for a split second, but then she nods and takes it.  
"Hey. Hey," I add, slipping an arm around her shoulders, because I'm stupid to think she's ever be interested, and it feels right, and I'm stupid...  
_Stupid, stupid, stupid._

"It's OK. We can talk about it when I come over," I add. As soon as I say it, I mentally slap myself. Tris is having a mental breakdown and all I can think about is going over to hers? She nods and presses her face into my chest, dampening my shirt slightly.

She drags in a deep breath and sits up straight, wiping her eyes. I'm amazed by her strength. Her face is dry, her eyes open wide.

"Do I look like I've been crying?"  
"No, Tris. You look tough as nails."

**PAGEBREAKOOPS**

The bell rings. Tris grabs my arm. "What time do you want to come over?" she asks.  
I'm almost surprised. After what happened in Music, I would have thought Tris wanted some time on her own.

"Around 5?" I venture.  
"OK," she says, smiling.

5 pm can't come soon enough.

_Tris POV_

I begin my journey home, walking down the street and taking a right. Four occupies my mind, my thoughts. I didn't feel bad crying in front of him, and that's a first. I'm usually very wary of letting anything out in front of others, but Four has broken down my walls and destroyed them.

I open the door, yelling out, "Anybody home?" I am met with stony silence. Mum's never home. She's a charity worker and is currently in Africa, whilst Dad is a high up government worker. Their jobs mean that we are well-off and have no economical problems, but it also means that Caleb, who is my brother, and I, almost never get to see them. Caleb is probably at a club. He's a geek - let me just say it. He holes himself up in his room with his books and studies. He doesn't socialise and his only friends he communicates with via online messengers. He doesn't have a social life.  
I can't talk, though.  
I change into something more suitable, and brush my hair, letting it loose. It's 4 pm, which means I still have one hour before Four comes.

I begin my homework, and around ten minutes into English, my phone buzzes.  
_Hey, it's Christina :) I got your number from Fou_r  
I frown, and then remember that I wrote down my number as well as my address on Four's hand.  
_Oh, hi! What's up?  
Nothing much. I just wondered when you were free to go shopping for a dress for the party in two days ;)  
_I groan. I had forgotten about the torture Christina was determined to drag me into.  
_I'm free after school tomorrow?  
Good :) I'll see you then?  
Sure!  
OK! I'll leave you with Foouuurrr, Trissy-poo! I want details tomorrow!  
UGH! BYE!_

The doorbell rings. I look at my clock, surprised, and realise I spent longer than I should have talking to Christina. I look anxiously at the mirror, then shake my head. I never care about my appearance, so why do I with Four?  
I open the door and smile at the sight of Four standing, hands shoved in pockets, looking down. He looks up and the most adorable, wide smile covers his face, making me grin even more.  
"Hi," I say nervously.  
"Hey, Tris," he replies, flashing me a smirk that makes my knees feel weak.  
"Come in," I say, holding the door open.  
He smiles at me one last time and steps into my house.

**A/N I'M SO SO SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING YESTERDAY IT'S JUST THAT the website went wrong and there was no server so I couldn't get to my Doc Manager and update…**

**Anyway, how was that?**

**There will be more fluff in the next chapter, and I'm sorry this one is so short, I cut it down for the sake of this getting out on time...**

**Tysm for all the reviews and faves and follows, they really do light up my day ^^**

**Have a good week!**

_~Joanna_


	7. Just A Little More

**A/N Hello again! I'm back with another SPECIAL VALENTINE'S DAY chapter! I want to thank all of you (again) for all the reviews and faves and follows! When I wake up and check my email in the morning to see somebody has bothered to read my story and has enjoyed it, it puts a smile on my face for the rest of the day :)  
****  
Today, I realised that this story has hit 1,000 views! I honestly cannot believe that my story has gotten so many reads, so thank you thank you thank you!****  
**

**Let's get on with it!**

**Disclaimer: I certainly do ****_not_**** have a net worth of 20 million dollars. I can conclude that I am not Veronica Roth.**

_Four POV_

I bite my lip nervously as I lift my hand to knock on the door.  
Tris stands in the doorway, smiling.  
I look her up and down.  
She's wearing a tank top and cotton shorts, showing off her slim figure. Her hair falls in loose waves, framing her heart-shaped face and making her blue-grey eyes stand out.  
I gulp and try not to let my jaw drop, instead smiling at her. I swear to god the world seems to stop as we stand there, staring at each other.  
She breaks off her gaze and says, "Hi," quietly, almost as if she's scared. It's so adorable that I just smile wider and say, "Hi, Tris."  
"Come in," she invites, holding the door open and blushing slightly. I smile, yet _again_, and step into her house.

She leads me into a wide wooden-floored hallway. "We can work in my room," she suggests, shyly, almost as if she's afraid I'll refuse.  
_I would never refuse you, Tris.  
_"OK," I reply, trying to make her feel at ease.  
She smiles at me gratefully, and takes me to her room.

Tris' room is much bigger than mine. She has a double bed with blue covers, and cream walls decorated with posters.  
"Doctor Who," I remark, laughing inside.  
She nods. "And Sherlock!" she adds eagerly.  
**(A/N hehehehe I'm a genius)  
**"So," she mumbles. "Do you want to start?"  
"Hmm," I smirk. "I don't really know you, so how about 20 questions?"  
"Um... OK?"  
"I'll start. What are your favourite bands?"

She pauses. "Probably Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco."  
I smile. "Good taste."  
She blushes even more and looks down at her feet.  
I grin even wider and say, "Your turn."  
"What's your favourite song?"  
I think for a moment and then reply, "Save Rock and Roll, Fall Out Boy."  
She nods and opens her mouth, but then her phone begins blaring.  
_  
I need more dreams_  
_And less life_  
_I need that dark _  
_In a little more light_  
_I've cried tears you'll never se-_

She looks at me, apologising. "Hello?"  
"HEY, TRISSY!"  
She looks alarmed. _It's Christina_, she mouths.  
I laugh and reply, _p__ut it on speaker.  
_She seems confused, but then nods and taps on her screen.  
"Christina? Why are you calling me?"  
"Why not?"  
"I'm busy," Tris replies through slightly gritted teeth. "Did you forget?"  
"Oh! With _Four_?"  
I laugh at Tris' half frustrated, half annoyed expression and take the phone from her hand. "Yes," I say, holding back my laughter. "With _Four_," I say, imitating her voice.  
"Oh my god, Tris! I'm so sorry!"  
"Eugh, it's fine. Just don't do this again, ok? We have an essay to write."  
"Ok. Sorry, Tris. Bye! GO GET SOME WITH FOUR!"  
She hangs up before Tris can retaliate. I burst into laughter.  
Tris glances up at me, her lips slightly pressed together, suppressing a grin, but then she gives in and begins smiling that adorable smile again. I glance at the clock, and realise we've already been talking for half an hour, and I have ten minutes to get back. If I'm late, Marcus will be furious. We have to go to some stranger's house for dinner. At home, he's an alcoholic, but somehow he manages to switch masks as soon as he's in public.  
"I have to go," I mutter. Tris looks up, an almost disappointed or even sad expression crossing her face. She nods and says, "Thanks for coming, even though we didn't actually do anything."  
"I know, I'm really sorry."  
"It's fine. I studied it in my old school. I'll have the essay done by Sunday."  
"Are you sure? It doesn't seem fair."  
"It's fine."  
It doesn't seem fair, to let her do all the work, but I know I'll never be able to get the essay done at my house, not with Marcus.  
"Ok," I reply reluctantly. "Bye, Tris."  
"Bye, Four."  
When she says my name, I stop. I want Tris to know me as who I am really am, not under a nickname. I've only known her for a day, but I trust her. And even though I feel our relationship hasn't been long enough for her to know my real name, I want her to know someday.  
"Do me a favour, and don't call me that." I suddenly say.  
"Then what should I call you?" she asks, tilting her head.  
"Nothing. Yet."  
I smile at her one last time and leave.

**OOPSY, THE PAGE BROKE...**

_Tris POV_

What was that? I scratch the back of my neck, confused. What does he hide from everyone, and why did he have leave so early? It's only just half past five! I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts of Four. I have to get ready. My dad told me that someone was coming over for dinner, and he'd be home in time. I go up to my room and try to decide what to wear. I mostly just have hoodies and tank tops. I bite my lip, then finally decide on a loose cream coloured sweater that stops just above my knees and jeggings. My phone rings, and I see that the caller is Dad.  
"Hello?"  
"Are you ready, sweetie?"  
"Yeah, nearly."  
"Good. I'll be home in two minutes, so start warming up the food, okay?"  
"Yes, Dad. Bye."  
"Bye."

I sigh as I go down the stairs into the kitchen. Dad doesn't know how to cook, so he just gets our maid, who comes in once a week, to buy frozen groceries whenever Mum's away. I've learnt how to defrost and warm up the food that we buy. I pull out some chicken breasts and peas. Dad's guests will be disappointed.

I hear to door open and poke my head out the doorway, saying, "Hi, Dad."  
"Hello, Tris."  
Even though he's not really home nowadays, Dad and I always had a strong relationship. When he was promoted and became a lot more busy, it deteriorated, but it still remains.  
"The food's almost ready," I say.  
"Good job, Tris."  
"I just have to go upstairs to finish off."  
"OK."  
I run up the stairs and brush my hair, styling it into a messy bun, but letting some of it loose and frame my face.  
The doorbell rings. "Tris!" I hear my dad call.  
I go to the door and open it, to see a man with a smile stretched across his face. There seems to be somebody behind him.

Then, the man steps aside, and I see who it is.

**A/N OOOHH! This isn't much of a cliffy, because it's kind of obvious who they are, but Tris doesn't have a clue, so it's somewhat sort of one?**  
**I excuse all the references in this chapter. I had Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco on replay, so that managed to weasel its way into there, and I'm also a massive Doctor Who and Sherlock fan, so that also found its way into this chapter.**  
**There might be another update today, I'm going to do my best. And the next chapter will definitely include FOURTRIS FLUFF! They're so cute together...**

**Anyway, happy Valentine's Day!**

_~Joanna_


	8. Dinner and Secrets

**A/N Hi! How is everyone?**  
**OK, so last time, there was a sort of** **cliffy? And I'm really excited to write this chapter so let's get going!**  
**Disclaimer: I'll call you when I'm a New York Times best seller and have a name beginning with Veronica and ending with Roth, OK? Don't wait up.**

_Tobias/Four POV_

As soon as I get in, I notice Marcus in the living room, scowling at me. "Get ready," he growls. "Put something nice on." He seems to have sobered up since last night.  
"Yes, sir."  
I sigh and make my way up the stairs, then decide to change into a clean black t-shirt and jeans. By the time I'm finished, Marcus is waiting impatiently at the door. He gets into his truck and I climb in next to him.  
"Be polite, Tobias."  
"Yes, sir."  
"Don't be the worthless piece of shit you are for once and make a good impression."  
I wince at his words, but I'm used to it. Ever since my mum, Evelyn, left, he's been angry all the time and has taken it out on me. My back is crossed with scars, and the reason why I find it hard to open up and make new friends is because of him. He is no longer Dad, or Father, but simply Marcus, and it is not home, but it is simply his house. As soon as I'm 18, I'm out of here and as far away as I can get from him.  
I am stronger now, and he doesn't have as much of an affect as he used to, but when I was younger it was hard.

His words still run through my head, sometimes. I don't want to believe them, but that doesn't mean I don't.  
_Worthless._  
_Puny._  
_Weakling._  
_Unwanted._

I stare out the window, trying to clear my mind, but then Marcus speaks again.  
"Don't embarrass me."  
"Yes, sir."  
"Stop talking like that!"  
"Sorry, sir." I say quietly. I learnt a long time ago that keeping my mouth shut was the best option, and that standing up would be of no use. I learnt to stay quiet.

Marcus brakes and we halt in front of a familiar house. I squint. Where have I seen it before?

_It's Tris'._

What?

_Tris POV_

Four?! Four is coming over for dinner?  
I cannot find any words, and for a moment, I stand there, dumbstruck.

I am saved by my dad coming out of the living room. "Marcus!" he exclaims. "How are you?" He ushers Marcus and Four in. "Come in, come in!" They shake hands. I look closer at Marcus. He is smiling widely, and at first glance, it seems genuine, but if you really look, it seems too wide and fake.  
"This is my daughter, Beatrice," Dad says. I smile and say, "I prefer to be called Tris. Nice to meet you." These niceties have been drilled into my head since I was small. I am used to having guests over, because of Dad's job.  
"Oh!" exclaims Marcus. "This is my son," he adds, gesturing to Four. "Introduce yourself," he says.  
"I'm Four." he says, nodding at us. "Your real name, son," smiles Marcus. I swear I can almost hear him say,"whatever," under his breath, but then he says, "I'm sorry. My name is Tobias." Marcus nods slightly, satisfied.  
My eyes flick to Four - or Tobias - for the first time since I spoke to Marcus. His eyes hold mine, and I see something in them I have never seen before - a warning, almost fear. I simply smile and take them into the dining room.

"Natalie not here?" Marcus enquires. I stare down at my food - plain chicken and tasteless peas. "No," says my father, looking sad. "She's in Africa."  
"It's a shame. But it is for a good cause."  
"Yes. So Tobias," my dad starts. Four - _Tobias_\- I remind myself. "What school do you go to?"  
He swallows and replies, "I go to Divergent High, sir."  
"Oh, really? Tris goes there too. It was her first day today. Do you have any of the same classes?"  
"Yes. Most of our classes are together."  
"That's good. Tris, if you two are done, why don't you take Tobias upstairs and occupy yourselves? His father and I have some things to talk about." I nod and look at Tobias for confirmation. "OK," I reply. I scrape my chair back. "Come on."

**PAGEBREAKOHGODTHATSEXUALTENSIONPAGEBREAK**

Tobias follows me up to my room. I open the door and shut it after us. When I look up, a scowl is on his face - the opposite of the laughing, smiling boy I saw earlier.  
"What's wrong?"  
He looks down at his feet. "Nothing's wrong. Just that a girl who I've only known for all of twelve hours has just found out my real name that I don't like anybody to know. It also just happens I may be _slightly _worried about it getting out, and that I also really li-"  
He stops himself before he gets any further.  
"Well," I say, crossing my arms, "I'm not going to tell anyone. You're going to have to trust me."  
"I already do," he mumbles under his breath. "But that's not the problem."  
"Excuse me?"  
"Nothing."

"Tris!" my dad calls. "Tobias and Marcus are going!"  
Tobias sucks in a breath. I wave him out of my room.  
"Tris?" he says, just as he is about to go down the stairs.  
I catch up with him, saying, "Yes?"  
"Thank you."  
He seems to be deciding something, and then his eyes flutter shut and he presses his lips to my cheek. My heart rate picks up, and I feel a connection everywhere his skin touches mine - a tingling electricity that replaces the blood flowing through my veins. He catches my gaze. His eyes are a sleeping, dreamy colour, and I feel for a moment that I am floating away.  
"I had to do that at least once."  
Without looking back, he goes downstairs. I stand there, shocked, my hand flying up to where his lips touched my cheek. A moment later, the front door closes and I see car lights moving away from the house. I walk into my room and close the door, then flop on the bed, grinning widely.  
_Tobias just kissed me._

And then, another thought hits me.

_Does he like me back?_

**A/N That was pretty short, I'm sorry. I wanted to do another bit but then I decided I should split it up and put it in the next chapter.**  
**Anyway, I watched the Insurgent sneak peak for about the 1000000th time and I'm SO EXCITED I CAN'T WAIT FOR IT TO COME OUT *squeals***  
**I'm on holiday, but I have a tonload of things going on. I'm going to be doing my best to write more often, but sometimes it's really hard.**  
**And if you liked it, please leave a review!**  
**I've also decided that I'm going to do this thing where I say what songs I was listening to while I wrote. **  
**Songs: Just One Yesterday, Fall Out Boy ft. Foxes**  
** The Phoenix, Fall Out Boy**

**Have a good day! ^^**

_~Joanna_


	9. The Girls

**A/N Hello! How is everyone?**  
**So this chapter will be more about Tris getting to know the girls as opposed to Four (don't worry, this story has plenty of fluff to come!)**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent. Ergo, I am not Veronica Roth. Genius.**

_Tris POV_

My phone screen lights up, showing Christina's name.  
I pick up.  
"Hello?"  
"TRISSY! WE'RE GOING SHOPPING TODAY!"  
"Of _course_! How could I forget?" I reply sarcastically through gritted teeth.  
"You can't!" Christina squeals, not catching my tone. "Because I'm your bestie!"

I have a best friend now? Definitely not complaining.

"Yes, Christina. Goodbye."  
I hang up, slightly annoyed, but can't help smiling as I walk out of the house. My phone buzzes. It's Caleb reminding me he stayed over at a friend's house last night. As I pull out of the driveway, I notice a tall figure a few metres away. I squint, and realise it's Four - or Tobias. I stop and wait until he reaches me, and then roll down the window, calling out, "Four!" He looks up from his shoes, surprised.  
"Do you need a ride?"  
"I thought you normally walked to school."  
"Well, I'm lazy."  
He half grins, and then opens the door, sliding in. "Thanks."

**TIME SKIP**

I wait impatiently by the main entrance for Christina, Marlene and Lynn. Soon, they appear, bringing with them another tall, slender girl. "This is Shauna," Christina says, offering no greeting. "She wasn't here yesterday, because she was still on holiday." Shauna smiles prettily. "Hi, Tris. I've heard a lot about you already."  
"You have?"  
She smirks. "Only good things."

"Let's go!" Christina squeals. "I'll ride with Tris, and the rest of you just follow her car. We're going to the mall!"  
Lynn scowls, then looks at me, almost smiling but not quite.  
"Don't try to get out of it. I've tried."  
I raise my eyebrows.  
"She's right," Christina interjects. "No matter how much you struggle."  
I shake my head, laughing slightly and get into my car, Christina following me.

**oops, the page broke...**

"Right." Christina says briskly, like she's a businesswoman. "Shopping is an art, not a chore." She leads us into a shop called 'Amity 21'. "Shauna, go look for shoes for Tris."  
"But you don't even know what size shoe I am."  
Shauna looks at my feet with pursed lips. "Five and a half."  
"How did you - "  
"You've got narrow feet. Strappy heels, definitely. Probably black. Christina, colour coordinate. We'll meet back here in one and a half hours, ok?"  
"Ok?" I venture.  
Shauna disappears into the aisles of shoes. "Mar, look for an outfit for Lynn." Christina commands. "I'll take care of Tris." Marlene nods enthusiastically and drags Lynn towards the shirts.  
"Hmm." Christina says, looking me up and down. I feel self conscious.  
"I've got it!" she squeals, dragging me towards the dresses. "Why can't I just wear a shirt, like Lynn?" I complain.  
"Because I said so."  
I roll my eyes. This is going to be a long evening.

xXx

An hour later, I stand in front of the mirror in the changing room, staring at my reflection. I'm in a white dress that hugs my body up until the waist and then flows out, stopping just under my mid thigh. The skirt is scattered with tiny diamonds and stars and to go with it, Christina shoved me into the room with a brown fishtail belt. I stare at the mirror again. It does hugs my 'curves' (which, may I mention, don't really exist) but I still feel self conscious. It's too short. I sigh and step out, preparing myself for Christina's onslaught of squeals.

"OH. MY. _GOD_. You look _gorgeous_! We are so getting this."  
"It's too short," I mumble, looking down.  
"It's perfect! I've decided it for you, we are getting this. How much?"  
I brighten up, hoping the dress will be too expensive for me to get, but my heart sinks when I read the price tag. It's only 20 dollars, because it's on sale.  
Christina looks at me. "Well?"  
I decide to lie. "It's 60 dollars. Too expensive."  
She squints at me. "Stop lying."  
"How did you kno-"  
"You're biting the inside of your cheek. It's your tell." I stop biting the inside of my cheek.

"Fine." I scowl. "I'll get it." Christina smiles and claps her hands excitedly. "We've still got half an hour. That means it's shopping time for me!" I sigh in relief, knowing that my torture is over.  
"Sit down," she waves. "I know what I want, I saw it last week." She disappears into the rows and soon comes back with a shimmery black dress, before heading into the changing room. Five minutes later, she comes out, looking amazing in the dress that enunciates her shapely curves. "Black wedges." she muses. "Yes. Black wedges."

By the time Christina finishes, Lynn, Marlene and Shauna are already at the meeting point. Shauna holds out a pair of white heels that wind up my legs, ending a few inches above my ankle. "I went back on the whole 'black' thing. Christina, what colour dress did you get her?"  
"White."  
"Good. I got shoes for everyone, not just Tris." She hands Lynn a pair of simple plain black flats. I see that Lynn is holding a creamy sweater and jeggings, and Marlene a pink lacy dress. Shauna also managed to find an outfit for herself, which is a dark blue miniskirt and a shimmery white tank top. Marlene is given a pair of salmon pink sandals, and Christina a pair of black wedges, just like she wanted.  
We all pay for our clothes and shoes, and then leave the mall. After driving back home and saying goodbye to the girls,who I feel I know a lot better now after our trip, I collapse onto the bed smiling.

**TIME SKIP**

"Tris!" Four calls, giving me a smile that ignites the butterflies in my stomach. "Are you going to Uriah's party tonight?"  
"Yeah, I was planning to."  
"I'll see you there," he says almost hopefully.  
I nod and head home, shaking off the feeling that Four is staring at me as I walk away.

Christina calls as soon as I get home.  
"OK. I'm coming over in half an hour with the girls to get ready. Bye!" she says, hanging up and not giving me any time to say anything.

The doorbell rings earlier than anticipated. I open the door and Christina rushes in, dumping a pile of clothes into my hands.

"Let's go!"

**A/N Hehe, now I've got you excited for the party... I hope? Anyway, I need some Truth or Dare suggestions so feel free to leave some in the reviews! I hope you enjoyed that. I'm sorry I haven't updated in what feels like ages, but school has started up and it's hard to write regularly and I'm doing the best I can. Next update in 1 to 2 weeks.**

**Songs listened to - Girls/ Girls/ Boys, Panic! At The Disco**  
**-Death Valley, Fall Out boy ft. Tommy Lee**

**Have a good week!**

_~Joanna_


	10. The Party (part 1)

**A/N Hello! How is everyone?**  
**I don't actually have anything to say, so enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Not Veronica Roth, OK? Don't own Divergent, OK? **  
**OK? OK.**

_Tris POV_

Christina rushes headlong into my house, then stops. "Where's your bedroom?" I shake my head, laughing slightly, and lead the girls upstairs. Marlene is holding supplies of what I'm guessing is makeup, and Shauna is dragging Lynn along.

Christina dumps all of our clothes onto my bed whilst Shauna puts a stereo down and begins playing music. Marlene says, "Where's the bathroom?"  
"Down the hall," I reply, still slightly shocked. Marlene nods and pulls Lynn out of the room.

"Right," Christina says. "Tris, get changed. Shauna, hair. I'll take care of the makeup." She pushes my dress into my hands and I quickly strip and slip the velvety material over my head. It fits perfectly, just like when I tried it on in the shop. Shauna tugs me towards the dressing table, where she has already set up several hair products. She forces me into the chair and begins combing my hair, then takes a pair of tongs.

"_Ouch_."  
"Oh, stay quiet. It'll be worth it."

And it is. When I look into the mirror ten minutes later, my hair frames my face in tangled waves. Shauna takes a bottle of hairspray and sprays it all over my head, making me cough. Christina takes me and makes me sit on the bed.

"Don't move."

She takes out a sheer peach lipgloss and makes me pinch my lips together to spread it. Then, she pulls out a stick of mascara and runs it along my eyelashes. I endure it until she reveals blusher.

"_No_. I am not wearing blusher, or eye shadow, or anything else."  
"_Please_?" Christina begs, looking at me with wide puppy dog eyes. "Just some light blusher, no eye shadow. I promise."  
I gnaw my lip. "Fine."  
"Yay!" she squeals, then takes a brush and runs it gently along my cheekbones. "There. All done." I look into the mirror.

I see a girl with wide awake blue grey eyes framed with slightly smudged black. She has noticeable cheekbones and a slight rosy blush. Her hair, which is a light tawny blonde and has light brown streaks running through it, is stylishly 'messy' and falls below her shoulders, ending a few inches above her waist.

I am not the shy girl with large glasses and an almost sad expression. I am not Beatrice, not anymore - not ever. I am Tris.

Lynn comes shuffling into the room, looking down. "Look up!" Christina demands. Marlene comes in after Lynn and shoves her lightly.  
"Come on, Lynn. You look good."  
Reluctantly, Lynn looks up. Her hair, which is just above shoulder length and brown, is straightened. She wears the sweater and pair of jeggings I saw when we went shopping. Even though the sweater isn't tight, I can see her body curves in all the places it should. I am jealous for a moment, wishing that I didn't look I was twelve, but it is quickly replaced by admiration when Shauna comes out of the bathroom in her skirt and top.  
"Shauna!" I say. "You look amazing!"

"Thank you, Tris. You as well. Christina, that dress! Marlene, you should go get changed."  
I turn to Christina, who is now sitting in front of the mirror, brushing her hair. Marlene changes into her dress quickly and begins applying make up. Soon, we are all dressed and ready to leave. We clatter down the stairs, I yell to Caleb that we're going out, and fifteen minutes later, we've pulled up to a big red brick house.

xXx

_Four POV_

**Tobias,**

**I'm going away for two days. I've left money with this envelope. If it's not enough, tough.**

-Mr Eaton

I sigh and throw the note away, then count how much he left me. 150 dollars. It should be fine. Looking up at the clock, I realise I have half an hour before the Pedrad brothers' party - the party Tris will be at. My heart skips a beat when I remember this, and I throw on a tight black shirt and jeans, then slip my feet into some white converse. I lock the door behind me. The house is less than ten minutes drive away, so I arrive just on time. I take a deep breath, and raise my hand to press the doorbell.

"Four, my man!" Zeke cheers as he opens the door, swaying slightly on his feet. I suspect the beer can he holds in his hand is not his first, and that he's already slightly drunk. Uriah comes up behind him, also a little inebriated, his face red. He pulls me in and claps his hand on my shoulder. I walk into the large living room. The room is dark and only lit up by flashing multi-coloured lights. Instinctively, I rake the room for Tris, and when I find her, laughing in the corner with Shauna, my heart rate picks up. She's in a white dress that hugs her body, and I notice things that I tell myself I should not, but that I do anyway. She has a slight rosy tone to her cheeks, and her eyes, rimmed in black, stand out even more, the stormy grey in them accented.  
She looks up and notices me, and the smile that spreads across her face is so adorable that I am able to muster up the strength to walk up to her, but as I do, I feel a hand on my shoulder.  
"Hey, Four," a voice whispers in my ear. It sends a sickly feeling down my neck. I spin around.

Lauren. I should have known. Why the hell did Zeke invite Lauren? He knows how much I hate her.

She's wearing a purple, sparkly dress. It's supposed to be tight - which it certainly is - so that it hugs her curves, but it doesn't work in the same way that Tris' does, instead looking plain slutty. It's also _way _too short. Other boys might like it, but it just makes me want to get away from her.

"Do you want to get out of here?" she continues, trailing her hand up my arm. God, this girl has no morals and no standards. I automatically compare her to Tris, who would never go to such desperate measures to get my attention. In fact, she doesn't even need to try - she always has it, and it demands to be kept. I am shaken out of my thoughts by Lauren, who says, "Well? Is that a yes?"

I desperately search for options, trying to find a way out. My gaze stops on Tris, who is staring at us. I think, for a moment, that I see hurt and even jealousy flash in her eyes, but whatever it is, it makes me realise that I have to do what Tris did in Music, but this time, she isn't going to help.  
"For Christ's sake, Lauren. I'm not interested. I never will be. Just _stay away_."  
"But -" she protests.  
"No."

I turn my back on her and walk to where I saw Tris, but she is gone.

**PAGEBREAKYPAGEBREAKY**

"Alright!" Zeke yells. "If your name isn't Four, Tris, Shauna, Christina, Lynn or Marlene, leave!"  
He hops down from the chair he was standing on, swaying and giggling as he lands on the ground. Everyone filters out, including Lauren - thank Lord - and only Zeke and Uriah's closest friends remain.  
"Truth or Dare time!" Uriah squeals.

Oh no.

**A/N Hehe, half cliffhanger! **  
**I saw a trailer of Insurgent and Tobias was just looking at Tris with so much love in his eyes and eugh SHIP SHIP OTP**  
**"Are you real?"**  
**"Yeah, I'm real."**

**Songs listened to: Brokenhearted, Lawson (cover by the Vamps)**  
**Alone Together, Fall Out Boy**

**Have a good week! Next update in one to two weeks!**

_~Joanna_


	11. The Party (part 2)

**A/N Hi! I hope you guys had a good week!**

**So this is the second part of the party, picking up from the beginning of Truth Or Dare. This is going to be a 50/50, with half in Tobias' point of view at the beginning, and ending with Tris'.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: **  
**Me: Tris, say that I don't own anything.**  
**Tris: Why? I've got enough problems, I'm dead and I miss Tobias.**  
**Me: Say it.**  
**Tris: Fine. She doesn't own anything.**  
**Me: That was easy.**  
**Tris: Eh.**  
_**Idek what kind of disclaimer that was -_-**_

_Four/ Tobias POV_

"So," Zeke slurs, collapsing next to me, "you and Tris, huh?"  
"I don't like her," I deny.  
_Lies, lies, lies.  
_"Please. Whenever any girl comes near you, you bite their head off. As far as I can see, Tris is still alive and you look at her differently from everyone else."  
"Fine," I mutter.  
"I knew it!" Zeke says. "We are so getting you hooked up."  
"You are not getting me _hooked up_ with anybody," I threaten, but Zeke has already called over Uriah and is whispering in his ear, whilst Uriah nods his red face.  
What have I gotten myself into?

"Let's start!" Marlene says. "I think we should make it Strip Truth Or Dare, to make it more exciting!"  
Tris interjects, her voice quiet but clear. "What's Strip Truth Or Dare?"  
_You really don't want to know, Tris.  
_"If you don't want to do or answer what is given to you, then you need to take off a piece of clothing. Socks, shoes and jewellery don't count." Christina explains. Tris looks alarmed._  
_

"OK!" Marlene says. "Lynn, truth or dare?"  
"Truth." Lynn says, glaring at Uriah, who says the same thing every time somebody answers like this.  
"PANSY-" Uriah begins shouting, but Lynn says, "Uriah, if you call me a pansycake I swear to God I will kill you."  
"What's a pansycake?" Tris says, smiling slightly.  
"It's slang," Shauna says. "Uriah found a book of old insults and one of the most rude things you could do was call someone a pansycake, and now Uriah's trying to being it back, which will never happen."  
"Hey!" Uriah complains.  
"Anyway," Marlene continues, "Lynn, who do you like?"  
Lynn flushes bright red - a first - and looks up at the clock, saying, "Oh look. It's nearly my curfew, I need to go." She pulls her bag over her shoulder and leaves in a hurry.  
"What was that?" Christina says. "I don't know," replies Marlene, her brow creased in confusion. "OK, um, Christina, I'll ask you since Lynn's gone. Truth or Dare?"  
"Truth. Uriah, shut your mouth."  
Marlene asks her the same question, and Christina is saved from answering by Shauna, who says, "Will."  
"Will?" I say.  
"Yeah, he goes to the same school but he's not really in our group. Christina met him at a friend's party and has liked him ever since."  
"Excuse me!" Christina exclaims. "It was my choice whether to answer it or not!"  
"Too late," Shauna smirks.  
"Four, truth or dare?" Christina asks.  
I think for a moment. Christina can come up with evil truths, so I go for a dare.  
"I dare you to tell us your real name."

I roll my eyes. I'm asked the same thing every time, and I respond in the same way every time as well. I pull off my shirt.  
Tris' mouth is slightly open as she sees me. She tries to look around to cover it up, but every time her eyes come back. Why is she staring?

_Could she like me?_  
_Don't be stupid._  
_But why is she staring?_  
_She's surprised._  
_Could she like me?_  
_Yeah, right._

"Have some grace, Trissy!" Christina teases, nudging Tris. "Stop staring!"  
Tris flushes, and even though I feel half flattered, half confused, I still want to save her from embarrassment.  
"Uriah, Truth or Dare?"  
"DARE! I AIN'T NO PANSYCA-"  
"Uriah," Marlene glares, "shut up."  
Uriah looks down and shuts his mouth, whilst Christina whispers something in Tris' ear. Tris chuckles. It's a quiet chuckle, but nevertheless, it sounds like music to my ears.  
"I dare you to... go outside and sing thirty seconds of a song that Marlene gets to choose."  
"Eugh, fine," Uriah says.  
Marlene chooses the song 'Best Of Both Worlds' from Hannah Montana.

Uriah steps outside into the driveway and begins singing.

_You get the limo out front_  
_ Hottest styles, every shoe, every colour_  
_Yeah, when you're famous it can be kinda fun_  
_ It's really you but no one ever discovers_  
_In some ways you're just like all your friends_  
_ But on stage you're a star_

_You get the best of both worlds_  
_ Chill it out, take it slow_  
_ Then you rock out the show_  
_You get the best of both worlds_  
_ Mix it all together and you know that it's the best of both worlds_

_ The best of both worlds!_

We're crying with laughter by this point, and Shauna has whipped out her phone and is videoing everything. Uriah's neighbours have opened their curtains and are staring at us, some annoyed, some amused. It's late at night, so we've probably disturbed a night's sleep.

**PAGEBREAKHEHEPAGEBREAK**

_Tris POV_

Four pulls off his shirt, showing his toned stomach muscles. I try not to stare, but it's difficult. My eyes always wander back to him.  
"Have some grace, Trissy! Stop staring!" Christina laughs. I look down, my face on fire. Four's eyes flick to me.  
"Uriah, Truth or Dare?" he asks.  
"DARE! I AIN'T NO PANSYCA-"  
"Uriah," Marlene threatens, "shut up."  
Uriah quietens down noticeably and I stifle a snort.

"The girlfriend always wins," whispers Christina in my ear. "They're together?" I say. "No, but isn't it obvious?"

"I dare you to go outside and sing thirty seconds of a song that Marlene gets to choose." Uriah groans, but consents.  
"I've got it!" Marlene exclaims. "The most embarrassing song! Best Of Both Worlds from the Hannah Montana movie!"  
Uriah gets up, shaking his head as he goes out the front door to perform his dare, us trailing after him in anticipation of the entertainment to come. He begins singing. He actually has a good voice, but we're laughing so hard it's hard to hear him. He stops after thirty seconds, then does a fancy bow to all the people staring out of their windows.

We stumble back into the house, clutching our sides. Uriah glares at all of us, half angry but still smiling slightly. I wipe tears from my eyes. We reform the circle, and the game resumes.  
"Zeke, Truth or Dare?" Uriah asks, grinning evilly.  
"Dare."  
"I dare you to put three handfuls of ice down your pants and keep it there for forty seconds."  
"That's easy," Zeke laughs.  
"Oh, you think?"

Uriah leaves the room and comes back a minute later with a bucket of ice. Zeke quickly plunges his hand into it and puts the ice down his trousers. "3, 2 1..." Uriah counts.  
"AHHHH! SHIT SHIT SHIT! URIAH YOU FILTHY BASTARD!"

We all burst into laughter as Zeke hops around the room and then rushes into the bathroom. Five minutes later, he comes back with different (dry) trousers on, glaring at us.  
"Tris, Truth Or Dare?" My eyes widen. I was hoping that I wouldn't be chosen, but I should have known better than to hope.  
"Nobody chooses a truth on their first time playing," Christina murmurs into my ear.  
"Um, OK then," I say nervously. "Dare."  
Zeke's eyes glimmer. "I dare you to sit on Four's lap for the rest of the game." he says smoothly, with no hesitation. Uriah grins drunkenly. Wait. Is this planned?  
"I don't have to do it, do I?" I ask. "I can just strip." I glance at Four, or Tobias - as I must call him by in my head now - and he looks half upset and disappointed, almost as if he wants me to sit on his lap. It's not that I don't want to be close to him, it's just that I'm not really touchy feely after Pe-  
"Well yeah," Uriah interrupts. "But you're just wearing a dress."  
"Should have warned you," Christina says. "Sorry." She doesn't look very sorry, though, because she's grinning evilly, as if she knew this would happen.  
"Aw, Tris!" Marlene says sympathetically. "You could have chosen Truth!"  
"What?" I shriek. "Christina!"  
"Ah ah ah, I never said you couldn't choose Truth. I said nobody actually does. Shame, though. You could have made history," she teases.  
"I hate you," I say.  
"You don't really, Trissy poo. Everyone loves me."

I roll my eyes. "OK."  
I get up and walk over to Tobias, and sit in his lap. Almost instinctively, he wraps an arm around my waist so I stay in his lap, then smiles at me. I smile back - I can't help myself - and then clear my thoughts. It's not like he could ever like me. Shauna gives Christina and Marlene a knowing smile. I shake my head.  
"Shauna, Truth or Dare?"  
"Truth."  
"PANSYCAKE!" Uriah screams, getting it in before any of us can say anything.  
"Anyway," I snigger. "Do you like Zeke?" I ask outright. I've seen them sneak glances at each other, and some point in the game, their hands somehow found their way together.  
Shauna snorts. "Tris honey, of course I do. He's my boyfriend."  
"Really?!" I exclaim. Tobias chuckles at my surprise, and then puts his hand to his mouth when I look at him, almost as if he is surprised I bothered to look at him.  
"Yeah. We're just not really believers in PDA."  
"Well that was useless," I mumble.  
"Marlene, Truth Or Dare?"  
"Truth."  
"Do you like Uriah?"  
Uriah's eyes light up and he nods to Shauna, almost as if thanking her. Shauna simply smirks.  
Marlene turns bright red and mumbles something under her breath.  
"What? I'm sorry, we didn't hear you." I tease.  
"Yes, OK?!" she yells, and then looks down again, her face still a tomato.  
Uriah has a grin on too wide for his face and he goes over to Marlene and whispers something in her ear. When he is finished, Marlene shrieks, "Yes! Yes!"  
Uriah places his hands on Marlene's cheeks and pulls her into a kiss. We all 'ah' and they only part when Zeke throws his sock at them and says, "Break it up, lovebirds! It's getting late, anyway. We need to finish up."  
We all say thanks and filter out slowly, leaving the Pedrad brothers to clean up the mess we left behind.  
"Oh, man!" Zeke says as the door closes after us. "I'm going to have a hell of a hangover tomorrow."

**A/N So, how was that? I'm sorry I took nearly two weeks to update, my life has been really crazy recently and I've had a lot of scripts and essays to write, but I have managed to write another chapter, and it's the longest one yet, I think it's nearly 2000 words? And I'm going to see Insurgent on something like the 23rd March? EEK SO EXCITED DEAD**

**Songs listened to: A Little Too Much, Shawn Mendes**  
**Favourite Record, Fall Out Boy**

**As before, next update in a few weeks. Have a good day!**

_~Joanna_


	12. It's You

**A/N So, this chapter is the beginning... it's the first bit of proper FourTris fluff! I'd say give me another chapter or two and then the wait is over.**  
**Also, I saw Insurgent and let me tell you it was AMAZING! All I'm going to say is FourTris is so damn cute I was literally like SHIP SHIP SHIP OTP the whole way through and everyone was giving me weird looks. Also, Peter is really funny. But there was this group of like eight boys that looked about two and they started throwing popcorn around, I was behind them so I didn't get hit but someone reported them and they left halfway through the movie, thank God. And the man next to me was so badly mannered, he was on his phone the WHOLE TIME and giggling with his girlfriend while making the loudest rustling noise I have ever heard, I swear. His drink apparently had 'too much ice in it' so you know what he did? JUST POURED IT ON THE FLOOR. I nearly tripped when I was making my way to my seat because of this freaking giant cube of ice he had spilt in front of it. I had to 'SHH' him like five times throughout the movie, sue me.**

**Disclaimer: Pretty sure I'm still not Veronica Roth. Also, pretty sure I don't own Divergent.**

_Tris POV _

It's been a week since the party, and it's another lazy Saturday for me. I can't be asked to call the girls so we can do something, which means I've resigned myself to a TV marathon of Sherlock with a tub of ice cream and a spoon.

I've settled down comfortably on the couch, legs crossed, remote beside me when my phone lights up, showing a text from Caleb.  
_Will be home in a few hours, Dad texted me saying he won't be home for dinner  
_I sigh. It's nothing new._  
OK. I'll get dinner ready for when you're back._

I wait a few minutes for him to reply, but he doesn't, so I shrug to myself and start the first episode.  
About an hour into the second episode, my phone lights up yet again. I glance down, swallowing a mouthful of rocky road, expecting it to be Dad or Caleb, but the word 'Four' comes up on the screen instead. My heart jumps. I quickly grab the remote and pause the episode, then pick up my phone and answer as calmly as I can.

"Four?"  
"Tobias," a voice on the other end corrects. "I want you to call me that when we're alone."  
"Um, OK? Tobias? Why are you calling me?" I sound confused but not nervous, which is ridiculous considering how fast my heart is beating and how clammy my palms are.  
"Where are you?"  
"At home?"  
"OK, bye." He hangs up, leaving me speechless and unable to say anything.  
_What the hell was that? _

I continue eating, but then, there's a knock on the door. I groan and force myself to move out of my comfortable position.  
I open the door.  
Tobias.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I say, my hands flying up to smooth my hair. I glance down. I'm wearing a loose black t shirt with pyjama shorts. Not exactly at my best.  
"Glad to see me, huh?" he laughs. "Anyway, I was bored and figured you would be longing for my wonderful company, so here I am."  
"Wonderful company?" I mumble, moving aside to let him in.  
"Isn't that obvious?"

He steps into the living room and arches an eyebrow at the freeze frame of John holding his hands up whilst Sherlock cocks a gun, then chuckles when he sees the tub of ice cream with a spoon stuck inside of it on the sofa. "Nice life for some," he quips. "Yeah, whatever." I say, turning the TV off. "Any chance of an undisturbed Sherlock marathon is gone, anyway, so what do you want to do?"  
"Are your parents home?"  
"No."  
"It's just us?"  
"Um, yeah?"  
"Well, we never got to finish the 20 questions, remember?"  
"Oh. So you want to..."  
"Uh huh."

I take him to my room and gesture for him to sit down. "OK, I'll start. Have you ever had a boyfriend?" he asks, curious.  
"No."  
"No?" He looks confused, but almost... happy?  
"I could ask you the same. Have you had a girlfriend?" I say, but I am already sure of the answer. Of course he has, with all the pretty, picture perfect girls throwing themselves at him all the time.  
"Um, no, actually. I haven't." he says awkwardly. "I don't know, I'm just not really looking for a relationship. Well, I wasn't."  
"You...weren't? But you are now?" I hazard. _Stop letting yourself hope.  
_"Yeah, well... I like a girl. And I'm not sure if she..."  
I laugh, even though it hurts, because I know it won't be me. My stomach feels hollow, empty.  
"Likes you back?"  
"Well, yeah. But she's kickass, and she's not just pretty, she's beautiful. She makes me laugh, because god, she's funny, and she's smart and she's trustworthy and a great friend. And I can only hope she likes me back."  
"Well," I swallow, "she must be lucky, huh?"  
_Don't cry. Don't you dare let yourself fucking cry._

Because I am looking down at my lap, fiercely trying not to blink back tears, I don't see Tobias moving closer to me until I sense his presence literally a few centimetres away from me. "Hey, you OK?" Tobias asks, slipping an arm around my shoulders.  
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine," I say.  
_Lies, lies, lies. _  
"Uh, I just need to leave for, like, five minutes."  
"That's fine. I'll wait."

I rush into the bathroom and bite my lip, trying to hold back tears.  
_You don't care._  
_You can't care._  
_You won't care._  
_Idiot, idiot, idiot. How could you let yourself fall for him?_

I grit my teeth and grind the heels of my palms against my eyes to stop myself from crying.  
_No crying.  
__Do not let yourself cry._

I drag in a deep breath, and tell myself that I will be OK, I will be happy for Tobias. I push open the door to my room open.  
"BOO!" Tobias yells as he jumps on top of me. I shriek and collapse onto the bed laughing as Tobias begins tickling me ruthlessly.  
He holds my arm in a lock. I can think of about ten ways to escape from his grip and break any part of his body, but I don't want to - all my senses have come alive, and I can smell his skin and the scent it carries, like sharp metal.  
"Mercy," he whispers, his breath tickling my ear.  
"No," I manage to get out.  
"Really?" he grins as he resumes tickling me.  
"Oh, god!" I howl. "MERCY! MERCY!"  
"Yeah?" Tobias pants.

And then I realise just how close we are. He is on top of me, his arms propping himself up as he stares into into my eyes. For a moment, I feel like I am dreaming, sleeping, in the small patch of dark blue in his left iris.  
His eyes flick down to my lips. "It's you, Tris," he says softly.  
We are so close together that our noses are touching, and his lips are inching closer and closer, and -

And then the front door opens.

"Beatrice, are you upstairs?" Caleb calls.  
"Uh, yeah!" I manage to yell, pushing Tobias off me whilst patting down my hair and clothes, which are rumpled after our game of Mercy. Tobias stands with hands in pockets, trying to look casual.  
I hear Caleb come up the stairs. He pushes the door open, and he stops short when he sees Tobias in my room.  
"Oh. Who are you?" he asks disdainfully. I remember that he wasn't at the highly awkward dinner we recently had, so I say, "Caleb, this is erm - Four. Four, this is my brother Caleb."  
"And why are you here?"  
"Er," I jump in, saving Tobias from answering. "He came over for, a - a project! Right, Four?"  
"Uh, yeah."  
"Well, if it's for homework, I guess it's fine." Caleb says. I roll my eyes. Caleb's a sucker for anything to do for work. It's the best excuse to use.  
"But, Four," he says protectively, "if you hurt Beatrice, I will hurt you. Understand?"  
"Yes, Caleb. And anyway, I would never dream of hurting her."

**A/N Oh god I feel so bad, but I hope this was good. My updates will be less frequent. They'll probably be between one and three weeks. Sorry for the rant at the beginining, I just needed to let it out somewhere. **  
**Songs listened to: Demons, Imagine Dragons**  
**Something Big, Shawn Mendes**

**Have a great week!**

_~Joanna_


	13. These Things Will Change

**A/N Hello!**  
**I'm on holiday, so for the next week I'm hoping that I'll be able to update extra. I've been away for four days WITH NO WI-FI (my Tobias I survived as well) at a church youth Easter conference in Brighton, so that was fun (I mean the camp was actually fun but the no wi-fi bit wasn't. At all.) Oh, and I've also started writing a book - but I will be putting that on hold for a few weeks because I love you all so much I'm going to spend my time writing fanfiction instead.**  
**Also, we hit 50 follows! Thank you!**  
**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I think I'll become a unicorn before I own Divergent. Meaning, never. (I wish I was a unicorn though srsly)**

_Four/Tobias POV_

I grit my teeth as the cold metal gnaws into my skin. "This is for your own good," Marcus hisses through his teeth, sweat forming beads on his brow. The look in his eyes is rabid and hungry, and I know that he's gone - there is no fetching him back until he comes back himself, a human that is turned monster. This is blind anger, and fire at its most furious.  
_I will not scream_, I tell myself, _when the next blow comes. I will not scream and show him that it hurts, that I am weaker than him, even if it is the truth._

Another blow lands. I scream silently, white hot pain coursing through me.  
_I will not scream.  
_And another, Marcus grunting with the force he puts into it.  
_I will not cry.  
_Marcus takes a breath, gathering his strength again, and then lands another blow on my already bleeding skin.  
_I will not be weak._

But I am, I am, I am.  
A shuddering breath, an inhaled scream. I will stay silent. He will not win.  
Marcus drops the belt to the floor, panting heavily. "It's enough for now. Go to your room."

I drag myself up the stairs.  
_Lift one leg, ignore the pain._  
I almost laugh when I realise it's my 18th birthday tomorrow. Meaning, that was the last beating I'll have. Meaning, I can leave.

I'm free.

xXx

A few weeks before Tris came to Divergent High, I skipped school to look at flats. Marcus may be an asshole, but he's an asshole with a considerable amount of money. He had opened up a trust fund, back in the days when Evelyn was still here and we were a normal family. He forgot about it, but I didn't. There are still monthly deposits that he makes from his bank account to my trust fund, and when I was 16, I was granted access. I didn't waste it all, instead saving so that I could afford to rent a flat. I hate that I have to rely on him so I can get away from him, but there's nothing I can do. Hopefully, in a few years, when I have a job, I can fend for myself.

It's a fairly reasonably sized apartment, with a small bedroom, kitchen, bathroom and even a tiny sitting room. I don't have much at my house. Two days ago, I packed the meagre things I had into a small bag that I often take out with me anyway, so Marcus wouldn't suspect anything. I'm sure I can buy whatever I need for living alone from the money I already have, including the bills. All my books are in my locker at school. Everything is going to plan. I'm not going to school today to move in.

The morning of my birthday, I act normal. I wake up early, get dressed, shower and take a cereal bar as I go out the door. "Have a nice life," Marcus sneers sarcastically, not knowing that I'm gone forever.  
_You too.  
_He won't care if I'm gone. He won't even notice, because half the time I'm never at home anyway.  
My heart beats fast as I step out onto the street. I really am free. I'm gone.

_Tris POV_

"Um... hey, Tris. It's... Tobias here? I have something I need you to help me with, so, uh, meet me outside school at the end of the day. Thanks."  
Tobias and I haven't really talked since...  
Since he told me that he liked me. Since we nearly kissed.

Since Caleb went and blundered in at exactly the wrong moment.

He was going to kiss me. I think.  
Ha. I hope.

Slowly, the day passes by. Tobias isn't in school today, which is odd, because to my knowledge he's never missed even a day. According to Dad, Marcus is a stickler for education. Just like Caleb.  
I wince as I remember the thick awkwardness in the room when Caleb interrupted us.  
The bell goes off. I manage to shove my way through the crowds of students who are pleased it's Friday and wait by the main entrance for him. I glance up from my phone to see a tall guy with tousled brown hair and dark blue eyes trying to fend off the gaggle of girls that descend on him.

"OMG, FOUR! Where were you today?" Lauren shrieks. "I missed you soooo much!" She flips her sleek highlighted black hair (with extensions, because what spoilt brat isn't complete without some?) over her shoulder and casts me a dirty look when she sees me approaching.  
"What are you doing here, _bitch_?" whispers Molly as I go past her. I don't let it get to me. Instead, I smile sickly sweet at her and say, "Tell me, where do you get the ape in your family from? Is it on your father's side, or your mother's?"  
It definitely isn't the best insult I've come up with, but it's enough to make the people close by 'ooh' under their breath.  
"What are you doing here, Four?" Lauren asks, batting her (obviously fake) eyelashes at Tobias. He raises an eyebrow and says, "I'm here to see Tris."  
"Ooh, that's just hilarious, Four!" Lauren laughs, high pitched. "Stop messing around with me! Have you got a car? I really need a ride. Pretty please?"  
I curse her with all the rude names under the sun under my breath and tap her on the shoulder. She whips around, snapping, "What? _Oh_."  
"_Hi there_, Lauren. What a _pleasure_ to see you." I say. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did that come out sarcastic? How rude of me."  
"Go away, bitch. He's mine." she spits out, furious.  
"No, I'm not." Tobias says, calmly. "Let's go, Tris." He grabs my hand (Lauren's eyes opening wide with envy at this) and pulls me away. "You watch out, little miss!" Lauren screams at me as we cross the car park. "I'll get you for this!"  
Tobias laughs under his breath, staring at me.  
"What?"  
"I never knew you were so good at handling people like that."  
"I'm not," I say. "The whole time I wanted to slap her bony ass."  
He laughs even more at that and replies, "You have no idea how much I hate her and her group. She seems determined to get me, despite all the times I've turned her down." He opens the car door for me and I slide in.  
"Where are we going?" I ask, bemused.  
"It's a secret."

The last time I was left alone with a boy, the worst thing in my life happened to me.  
I wince.  
"What's wrong?" Tobias asks, keeping his eyes on the road as he pulls out.  
"Nothing."

I can trust him. Can't I?

I reach over and change the radio. A song comes blaring out.

_I know you're an emotional girl_  
_ It took a lot for you to not lose your faith in this world_  
_ I can't offer you proof_  
_ But you're going to face a moment of truth_  
_ It's hard when you're always afraid_  
_ You just recover when another belief is betrayed_  
_ So break my heart if you must_  
_ It's a matter of trust_

Tobias winks at me and begins singing along in a terrible out-of-tune voice.

_This time you've got nothing to lose_  
_ You can take it, you can leave it_  
_ Whatever you choose_  
_ I won't hold back anything_  
_ And I'll walk away a fool or a king_  
_ Some love is just a lie of the mind_  
_ It's make believe until it's only a matter of time_  
_ And some might have learned to adjust_  
_ But then it never was a matter of trust_

"Oh, my god," I laugh as he parks the car, humming the outro. "What was that?"  
"What, you didn't like my voice? I thought it was amazing! I'm on the way to being a _star_!" he says, Lauren-style. "Come on."

We've arrived outside a block of apartments. We climb up the stairs. Tobias pulls out a set of keys and unlocks a door.  
"You live here?" I say. "But don't you live with your dad?"  
"Not anymore."  
"Oh!" I say. "I forgot because you weren't in school today. Happy birthday!"  
"Yeah. I have something I need to show you."

He turns around and pulls off his shirt to reveal a medley of bruises and scars along his back.  
"Tobias..."

I run my fingers delicately along the marks on his back.  
"Did _he_ do it to you?" I say, biting back my anger.  
"_Ahh. _That area's sore_."_

"I'm sorry," I say, immediately taking away my hand.  
"No, it's OK. And yes, he did."

"How long?"  
"Since when?"  
"He started."  
"I was 6."

"The selfish bas-"  
"It's OK, Tris. I'm an adult now, remember? I can live on my own."

I pull him into a hug, making sure to avoid the fresh bruises along his back.  
"I'm sorry, Tobias." I say softly.

I release him slightly.  
"Thank you," he says.  
"For what?"  
"For being amazing."

He presses his lips to mine. I rise up and wrap an arm around his neck, deepening our kiss. His lips are soft and sweet and gentle, the opposite of Peter's. This time, I don't let his memory stop me.

_Tobias/Four POV_

We walk out, hand in hand. The radio starts up again.

_So we've been outnumbered_  
_ Raided and now cornered_  
_ It's hard to fight when the fight ain't fair_  
_ We're getting stronger now_  
_ Find things they never found_  
_ They might be bigger_  
_ But we're faster and never scared_  
_ You can walk away, say we don't need this_  
_ But there's something in your eyes_  
_ Says we can beat this_

_ Because these things will change_  
_ Can you feel it now?_  
_ These walls that they put up to hold us back will fall down_  
_ This revolution, the time will come_  
_ For us to finally win_  
_ And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah_

_ Tonight we stand, get off our knees_  
_ Fight for what we've worked for all these years_  
_ And the battle was long, it's the fight of our lives_  
_ But we'll stand up champions tonight_

_ It was the night things changed_  
_ Can you see it now?_  
_ These walls that they put up to hold us back fell down_  
_ It's a revolution, throw your hands up_  
_ Cause we never gave in_  
_ And we sang hallelujah, we sang hallelujah_  
_ Hallelujah._

**A/N OH MY GOD THEY FINALLY KISSED YAY  
****I'm sorry my updates are so infrequent now, but I'm hoping that the longer waits mean slightly better and also longer chapters.  
And this is where the fluff begins because they finally kissed YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW DESPERATE I WAS FOR THEM TO KISS BUT I COULDN'T BECAUSE IT WOULDN'T BE SO GOOD IF I RUSHED IT AND OMG IT WAS SO HARD  
**

**Songs listened to: I Don't Care, Fall Out Boy  
Change, Taylor Swift (which is also the last song by the way. The first one was A Matter Of Trust, Billy Joel. If you're clever, maybe you can see what I'm foreshadowing or suggesting here.)**

**I'm hoping to update in about a week or two. Meanwhile, have a good day!**

_~Joanna_


	14. AUTHOR'S NOTE

**A/N**

**Hello!**  
**Sorry to say that this is not an update. **

**And I'm sorry to say that from here on out this story is on indefinite hiatus.**  
**I have extreme difficulty getting updates up because I've recently just hit a really bad low in my life and I just need time to myself. Recently fanfiction has become more of a duty rather than a hobby and I don't want it to be like that, I want to be writing fanfiction out of enjoyment.**  
**However, I am not giving up on this. Updates will come maybe about once every month or so. If you want to remove me from your list of favourites or follows, feel free, but please do it quickly. I want it to be all over at once rather than seeing the numbers go down daily. **  
**I love you all.**

_~Joanna_


	15. (Not Dead)

**A/N I'M BACK!**

**Yes, I am back to writing and I am really sorry for the two month disappearance. I feel like I essentially just left you guys and owe you an explanation, so here it is:**

**One of the things I have always been proud of is overcoming my depression. Recovering from the shit I've gone through is my biggest achievement and beating my self harm is also something I am really, really, really, proud of. But just before I put this story on a break, my depression relapsed - that is to say, it came back and I couldn't cope.**

**I couldn't find it in myself to write and I couldn't find it in myself to carry on, and that's why the gaps in between chapters became increasingly longer until I realised I couldn't keep delaying and making excuses to myself. I felt it was better to just stop and pull myself together and then update regularly with good chapters that I felt satisfied with, rather than forcing my writing and feeling pressured to update, sporadically at that. For the past few months, I have found it really difficult to cope. I had too much stress in my life that was partly just me pressurising myself and it just became too much.**

**To tell the truth, I don't think that I've completely defeated my depression. As I am writing this, I know that it's never really going to leave me, but that's OK. But I am beginning to recover my footing, and I feel ready to begin writing a little more. I will be updating in a few weeks, and my updates when I get back to regular schedule will be less frequent than before, I'm sorry to say. It's just I need time to adjust.**

**I also want to say something if you, reading this, is going through hard times. I want you to know this: though you may feel you are alone, you most certainly aren't. It is a long, long journey, and we all have some way to go. And you know what? Like I said, I don't think that depression really ever leaves you. It will fade, but it will not leave, and I think that's OK. And if you are considering taking your own life, I beg of you: do not. Please, please, please do not commit, do not swallow the extra pill, do not tie the rope, do not pull the trigger, do not cut just that little deeper than normal. Just don't. Because even if you don't feel like anyone cares, I do. I care a lot. Please just private message me, kik me at .fall or direct message me on Instagram . . Because I believe you are worth it. I really do. I love you all and I will always care.**

**Love,**

**Joanna x**


	16. Lauren

**A/N I'm back, with a new chapter! I know I've been away for some time, but I hope you guys enjoy and I'm sorry for my absence. Also, thank you so so so much if you sent me supportive messages, you know who you are. It meant so much that people cared. Thank you x**

* * *

_Tris POV_

I'm sitting in English class taking notes when I feel something sharp jab my back.  
I turn around to see Lauren scowling at me. She holds up four fingers and then points to herself. I roll my eyes and turn back around, knowing what she's saying. She's only said it five times over the past week.  
I'm unsure of the status of my relationship with Tobias. We kissed yesterday, and I haven't seen him today yet because this is the one class I don't have with him.  
"Tris, are you paying attention?" Mr David says sharply. I snap back to attention.  
"Bitch," Lauren whispers in my ear. I will myself not to snap back 'whore' and sink to her level, instead gritting my teeth and looking back at the teacher and saying, "Sorry, Mr David."  
"Just don't do it next time," he says, his eyes softening.  
Molly, who is sitting in front of me - yes, unfortunately, I'm quite literally sandwiched in between two sluts - turns around and mouths, _'Teacher's pet.'  
_I ignore her and continue taking notes.

5 minutes before the end of the lesson, my phone buzzes. I check it discreetly underneath the table.  
_Meet me behind gym in 10 minutes - Tobias_  
Why would he want to - oh.  
_Sure._

**PAGEBREAKYPAGEBREAKY**

I sling my backpack over my shoulder and make my way out the classroom, careful to avoid Lauren and her group of minions. It takes a few minutes to get to the gym. When I turn the corner, Tobias is already there waiting. I approach him nervously.  
"Hi," he says.  
"Hi." I look down, shy.  
I'm surprised when he pulls me into a hug. He feels strong and warm and sure, his arms wrapped around me - not overbearing, like Peter's, but protective and safe.  
He pulls away and dips his head, his forehead touching mine. His warm breath fans on my face.  
I raise my head so our eyes meet. I close my eyes.  
His soft lips touch mine.

I am on fire.

It feels so right - this is right. There is electricity running through my veins. I have never felt so alive - so wide awake and sleepy all at once. It is a sweet kiss, and I try to put all the emotions I only save for him into it.  
Eventually, we pull away for breath. We stare into each others' eyes for a few minutes.

'That was a nice greeting,' I chuckle.  
'Oh, so all that was was nice?' He feigns hurt and holds his hand to his heart.  
'Yep. Not good enough.'  
'Oh, OK then. What about this?'

He pulls me closer and leans forward so his lips barely touch mine. I try to steal the kiss but he moves away and instead just pecks my cheek.  
'Hey! No fair,' I say. 'You can't tease me!'  
'But I can,' he smirks.  
'Fine. Then I'm leaving.'  
'Fine then.'  
'I will.'  
'OK then.'  
We stare at each other for a few seconds and then simultaneously burst into laughter.  
'I will, then.' I say through giggles. I turn away and begin walking to my next class.  
'Wait!' he says.  
'Hah! Got you,' I say. He doesn't reply, instead coming towards me and pulling me into a dizzying kiss, this time more powerful and passionate. By the time he pulls away, I am left breathless and shocked.  
'See you after school!' he smirks, and walks away, leaving me standing behind him.

_Asshole._

**ANOTHERPAGEBREAKYAY**

I walk out of Science, texting Tobias.  
_Will be at car in 5 minutes_  
_OK. See you there x_

I smile as I pocket my phone, sling my backpack over my shoulder and begin walking towards the car park. But I don't get very far.  
I feel a hand clamp my shoulder. A hand with perfectly manicured nails that I can feel sharply digging into my shoulder. Instinctively, I whip round into a fighting stance.  
'Oh, my god, Tris. You don't have to be so... violent. Guys don't like that.' Lauren's minions laugh dumbly behind her.  
'How would you know?' I spit.  
'Oh, you'd be surprised,' she smiles venomously at me. 'Four might be impressed, but he won't in time. Not with... _me_ around.'  
'You don't even know his real name.' I counter, suddenly protective of my new relationship with Tobias.  
'Right, and you do,' she says dismissively. 'Nobody knows his real name. But rest assured, that will change. I have my ways of convincing people.'  
'You mean, sleeping with them.' I snort. Her minions fall silent.  
Lauren turns red. 'Oh, that's _it!_' she shrieks. 'It's on! I bet you that I'll get together with Four before you do.'  
I feel my phone buzzing in my pocket.  
'Yeah, right.' I say, sarcastic. 'He specifically said he would never be interested in you.'  
'THAT WILL CHANGE!' she shrieks.  
_He's already with me._

'Fine. Saturday night, at the bowling alley. Whoever kisses him first wins the bet.'  
I consider it. Is it worth playing such an immature game with somebody like Lauren? It's a matter of pride on my part.  
I tilt my chin up. 'Fine.'

As I walk away, my phone slips out of my back pocket. The screen lights up. Lauren swoops in, her eyes widening as she turns on my screen and sees Tobias' messages.  
'What is this?' she shrieks.  
_'Where are you? Worried x,' _she reads out.  
_'Missing you, come quick xx,' _she continues.

'What?!' she screams. I walk up to her, grab her wrist, twist it and grab my phone out of her hand, then dial Tobias' number. He picks up immediately. I click on speakerphone.  
'Tris? Where are you? I've been waiting for ten minutes and I got really worried.'  
'Hi, Four. Calm down, I have an explanation. I have quite a story for you.'  
'What happened? Are you OK?' he asks, sounding stressed out.  
'Calm down,' I repeat. 'I'll tell you in the car. See you.'  
'OK,' he replies, his voice softening. 'See you.'

I shake my head at Lauren and walk away.

* * *

**A/N How was that? I know I've been away for quite a while, so my writing might not be up to scratch, but I tried my best :) If you read my last update, you'll know updates will be less frequent now. However, it's the summer holidays for me, so I have more time on my hands which means I'll be writing better and more. I hope you guys have a good day. And please message me if you need support or someone to vent to or just someone to listen. I will always be here. PM, DM on my instagram or Kik me at .fall. I love you all.**

**Songs listened to: **

**\- Save Me A Spark, Sleeping With Sirens  
\- The (Shipped) Gold Standard, Fall Out Boy  
\- That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed), Panic! At The Disco**


	17. Moving On

**A/N HELLO! HOW ARE YOU ALL? WHY THE FUCK AM I WRITING IN CAPITALS? IT LOOKS LIKE I'M REALLY ANGRY SORRY  
I'm not going to ramble - here's the new chapter!**

**Disclaimer: yeah lol no sorry I don't own Divergent lmao**

* * *

_Tobias POV_

I glance down at my phone, checking it the sixth time in five minutes. Tris is nearly 10 minutes late and I'm getting worried. After another anxious minute of waiting, I finally decide to text her. Almost immediately, my phone begins to vibrate and I pick up her call, relieved.  
'Tris? Where are you? I've been waiting for ten minutes and I got really worried.'  
'Hi, Four. Calm down, I have an explanation. I have quite a story for you.'  
I straighten up, suddenly worried again. 'What happened? Are you OK?'  
'Calm down. I'll tell you in the car. See you.'  
Exhaling, I reply, 'OK. See you.'

**WHEREIN JOANNA CANNOT COME UP WITH A FUNNY/CREATIVE WAY OF TELLING THE READERS THIS IS A PAGE BREAK!**

Tris opens the car door and slides in.  
'Hey,' she says, smiling at me. I smile back and start up the car. As I pull out of my space, I ask, 'What was that all about? Why were you late?'  
She rolls her eyes and replies, 'I, er, bumped into Lauren on my way out of my last lesson. You can imagine how that went.' I whistle through my teeth and shake my head. Tris continues, 'She saw your texts as well, which didn't help. She got mad at me and started shrieking in that voice of hers.'  
I laugh as I turn the wheel and accelerate. 'Well, I'm never gonna be with her, so she can continue being a jealous bitch for as long as she wants to.'

Tris simply smiles and places her hand over mine on the clutch. 'Hey, um, I was wondering...' she says, biting her lip, 'if you were free on Saturday? To go bowling, I mean.' I look up to the mirror and turn the corner before replying, 'Yeah, I don't think I'm doing anything with the guys. I can pick you up around seven?'

She bites her lip again before saying, 'You could ask if the guys wanted to come and I can ask the girls. It can be like a night out, if you want.'

'Sure,' I say. 'I'll ask and text you later.'  
'OK,' she says. I feel like something's wrong, something that she's not saying.  
'Is something wrong?' I ask as I pull up next to her house. She blinks rapidly before replying slowly, 'No, why?'  
'It just seems like something's not OK.'  
'No, trust me, it's fine,' she says. I nod and get out of the car before opening the door for her.  
'Such a gentleman,' she smiles, as we walk up the path holding hands.  
'Bet you gentlemen don't do this,' I say. I pull her close and push her against her door, resting my forehead to hers. Her eyes flick up and her gaze rests on my lips.

'Are you going to kiss me?' she asks breathily. I bring my lips closer, about a centimeter away from hers, and reply, 'Maybe.' She bites her lip and doesn't break her gaze whilst bringing her face even closer. Our breaths mingle. I slowly move forward, intending to finally kiss her, but she moves back. 'Who's the tease now?' she says.  
'Oh, shut up,' I reply, and before she can resist I kiss her hard. Her hands slip down my back and under my shirt. I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her even closer, until we are one person and there is no space between us, and it still is not enough. After thirty seconds, she breaks the kiss and places her arms around my neck. 'I'll see you tomorrow,' she says, before quickly turning around, slipping into the house, and closing the door behind her. I am left standing, heart still beating, eyes wide, at her front door. 'Tease!' I shout, coming to my senses. Her bedroom window opens above me and I hear her shout down, 'Loser!' I shake my head, smiling ridiculously, and get into my car before driving off.

As I turn my key in the door of my flat, I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. Thinking it's probably one of the guys or Tris, I pick up without looking at the screen.  
'Hello?'  
'Tobias.'

I freeze and let go of the handle, leaving my key in the lock. I swallow thickly.  
'Who is this?'  
'You know full well who I am,' Marcus replies, his voice silky smooth and threatening. He must be sober today. 'You didn't come home last night.'  
'No,' I reply, heart in throat.  
'Then where are you?'

'You aren't my home anymore, Marcus,' I reply, standing up straight.  
'No? Then what is?'

I take a breath before saying, 'My own flat.' There is silence on the other end.  
'And where did you get the money for that?'  
'The trust fund.'  
'What trust fund?'  
'The one you set up.'  
'I set up nothing of the sort. I did not raise my son to be a _liar._'  
'You did. Before... before Mum died.' Another silence ensues.

'My money?'  
'I'm paying you back,' I quickly say, making it up on the spot. 'I refuse to rely on you any more.'  
There is heavy breathing and nothing is said. Because now, he cannot do anything. I am no longer going to be trampled on; I am my own person. I am no longer the small boy who sat silently in his grey bedroom in his grey clothes. I am no longer the teenager beaten black and blue with a violent alcoholic for a father and a dead mother.

I am Tobias.

So I hang up, enter my flat and close the door behind me. And before I do anything else, I press on Marcus' contact and block it.

* * *

**A/N FINALLY, AN UPDATE!**

**I hope you enjoyed the new chapter. Thank you for all the follows/faves/reviews, they make my day :)**

**I'll see you guys soon ^**

**Songs listened to: **

**Colours, Halsey**  
**Emperor's New Clothes, Panic! At The Disco**  
**Cinderblock Garden, All Time Low**

_~Joanna_


	18. End

**a/n**

**so, hi.**  
**it's been a while.**

**yes, i am still alive. and unfortunately, no, i will not be continuing with this story. i definitely owe all of you an explanation as to why i disappeared for nine months.**

**i started writing this story back when i was still obsessed with the divergent series. of course, i still enjoy it: i'm going to be watching the last part of alleigant when it comes out for sure, but i just don't like it as much as i used to.  
also, about a week after my last update i realized how bad the story was (i've improved a lot since then) and decided i'd be taking a break to try and figure out what i'd do: whether i'd stop writing the story, or whether i'd try to salvage it. eventually the break got longer and longer and i got caught up in a lot of things, so i never really got round to telling you all what would happen.**

**a lot can change in nine months. i really am very sorry i've left you hanging so long only to tell you i won't be continuing a new beginning any longer. however, i do know how shitty it'd be if i just ended it like this, so this is the rough plan of what i had sketched out: **

**_(TRIGGER WARNING: MENTIONS OF RAPE AND ALCOHOL ABUSE)_**

**lauren wins the bet by forcing herself onto tobias. tris misinterprets this and breaks up with tobias, not allowing him a chance to explain or apologize. she severes all contact with everyone except christina and becomes more withdrawn as the weeks go by, especially as her parents begin to argue more frequently. eventually, christina gets together with will, leaving tris feeling ignored and useless. **

**one day tobias catches tris on her own and forces her to listen to him, explaining that he never kissed lauren, rather the other way round, and tris forgives him (although they don't get back together, instead just staying friends although tobias wants more.) christina also realizes she's been neglecting tris and makes an effort to fix their friendship.**

**a few months later, a new student turns up at the school: peter. it is revealed that peter is tris' ex boyfriend who raped her whilst she was drunk and unable to give consent at a party. as a result of this, tris got pregnant and was forced to give up her baby for adoption. upon seeing peter, tris falls back into the self hate that she found herself in after the attack and again runs away from everyone and everything. at the same time, her parents decide to divorce, adding another load to tris' back. tris starts skipping school in an attempt to avoid seeing peter, and doesn't respond to anyone's messages. one night she gets drunk despite vowing to herself that she'd never consume alcohol again after what happened with peter and turns up at tobias' flat. tobias takes her in and slowly tris begins to come to terms with what she's gone through. **

**no, i didn't plan for tris and tobias to get together at the end of this story - although who knows, maybe if i'd written a sequel, they would have. yes, i leave what happens with peter unknown. that is up for you, the reader, to decide. **

**in terms of what will happen next, this account will be inactive. i won't be putting my writing up on here anymore, although you can find me on wattpad at nebulahowell where i currently have a few stories in the works. you can also follow me on any of my social media accounts (which are in my bio.) **

**thank you to anyone who voted or commented or read this story. i know it wasn't much, but i hope you enjoyed it.**

**goodbye!**


End file.
